hi

intern year is over. i’ve been elated now for 3 days straight. i am sure the gloss of not being everyone’s bitch will wear off soon enough (especially since i have to spend my august being exactly that in the PICU), but for now it is filling me with gratitude, joy, and ambition to make this new PL-2 year a great one. so:

some goals for the year

1. do my homework. this year i was pretty much horrendous on the formal-learning front. interns really do get most of their education on the front lines, and at least in my program, are not truly expected to put in a lot of time reading outside of work. i DID learn a lot by ‘doing’, but now it is time for me to step beyond the practical and start my homework as a senior, which means regular and consistent reading. josh and i are going to work on this one together and my goal is to crank out a mere 30 minutes daily of reading/studying. if i get more in on some days, great; if not, at least it will be a large step up from the typical 0 minutes that i put in this year.

2. drop the tude. as a tired intern it was SO easy to get in the habit of complaining about everything. in fact, it became a coping and bonding mechanism between us interns to rant about pretty much any work that was sent our way (although we did it anyway, of course). we had a mindfulness retreat (something i have been interested in for a long time) and for the jillionth time i was reminded that it’s often how you choose to experience things that creates the timbre of that particular experience. taking a deep breath and focusing on one thing at a time — even if attention DOES have to shift every few minutes to keep up with everything — is something i have to work on this year. that, and just being more positive in general. no one wants their team leader disgruntled and agitated all the time. and now, i’m going to BE that leader. scary, but true.

3. keep running. even though i got injured and couldn’t run the virginia beach marathon this year, training for it really helped keep me sane throughout the fall and winter, and i plan on continuing to train and keep up my active lifestyle. i really think that movement is a natural part of life and that it works as a natural antidepressant for me. i also really love having non-work related goals such as races. so — my next planned race will be the thunder road half marathon in charlotte on december 13th, assuming i can get the weekend off. i am even going to take a big step into running nerd-dom and start posting my training on this blog, to log my progress and to help motivate me to actually keep doing it.

4. relax and enjoy life in the present. and i mean all of life — the work, the workouts, and the downtime. no matter what i am doing, i want to try to avoid thinking back about what i could have done better or forward about what i could be doing instead or what i might do later. every moment happens once, and life is short. and getting shorter every day . . .

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in other news, orla kiely is now making stationary. and LOOK WHAT I GOT! this makes me inexplicably, ridiculously giddy. i don’t know what i will use it for, but i am sure it will change my life in some positive way.