You may have noticed I have not been posting here early these days. This is because my runs are starting earlier, since I am often training for a bit longer. And when I thought about it, I was loathe to move:
- my morning reading
- morning meditation (because I usually am just not in the mood for it later on)
- planning tasks – currently this includes: filling in my 5-year journal, adding a few things to my EC Monthly (reading + screen time), and planning out the day
I didn’t want to get up any earlier, and I didn’t want to make my workouts any shorter.
SO. Here we are. It’s lunchtime, I am done with morning patients, and this is starting to feel like a viable routine.
(Some days I will still post early, especially on non-clinical days when I have more flexibility. But I think this will be the new normal for now.)
I ran with my social group (my fast friend + others who are closer to my pace) this morning. I did fine for about 4 miles while we were all together, but then just felt done. Similar to my failed tempo after flu. This time, I’m more confident that it’s post-viral performance lag.
My half marathon is 1.5 weeks away though and I’m not sure I am quite where I want to be.
I am not thrilled about this forecast, though obviously it can change:
On the up side, I am very used to training in those temps. AND the race starts at ~6 am (or even 5:50?) so not too much time with hot sun beating down.
On the down side, BAH. This is not actually that far from average in Ft Lauderdale for mid-Feb. But I was still hooping for a cooler day.
I guess the lesson is that if I want PR-worthy weather . . .don’t run local races.
I still wonder why I care about ‘racing’ and training and striving (ie, my desire get faster and eventually BQ). From a purely logical perspective, it’s silly. Like – why waste mental space on something I am not even naturally good at? I’m never going to get anything tangible from my running career; actually the opposite is the case. I don’t need running to achieve a certain physical ideal (honestly, weight training works better for that in my case). Running a few times casually/week would be plenty for fitness and a little endorphin rush. And while I sometimes feel really good after a harder run, they (for me) can also trigger migraines.
AND YET. Here we are. Here I am.
I am more mid-pack than ever and more obsessed than ever. I listen to running podcasts (like . . . several) and have a long lists of races I want to run. I am planning on spending my allowance money on a running coach after this race even if I know the changes coaching might induce will be arbitrary to anyone but me. And I wonder why, but then it’s also like . . . why do anything?
Life is short. I find this (mental and physical) game fun. So I guess I will keep playing.
BLPA Spring Launch Update
This has gone really well!!! I released the signup info to the waitlist yesterday and was so excited to see some longtime readers on the list. The cohort is (as of now) ~2/3 full. Grateful that people continue to put their confidence in me! I definitely plan on doing a detailed exit survey of both cohorts so that I can continue to make the program better and better with time.
Oh! I had such a great specialty session* with Cohort 1 yesterday, meeting with many of the academics in the first round. It was so great that I have decided to keep the “specialty sessions” as open to all alumni of BLPA as long as it is offered – meaning, people will be able to have mini-reunions and kind of revisit the course and follow up on progress during these sessions.
*BLPA has 7 core sessions going through different levels of planning which are webinar/workshop style, but the specialty sessions are designed to be more social with those who have different challenges in common. There is one for parents of young kids/pregnancy, one for academics, one for health care providers, and one for empty nest/child-free. (Anyone is welcome to come to any so I loved having an attorney join us in academics yesterday!)
This is great – congratulations on all of your training! It has been inspiring and I’ve echoed your thoughts about allocating so much mental & physical energy to PRing – to basically no one’s care but my own – but I think it’s personally satisfying as an achievement or milestone-oriented person. I love hearing about your journey!
On a related note, have you read the book Endure? It’s not new, but I’m listening to it on my commutes right now and I am completely obsessed. Must read if you’ve not already!
Good luck on your race!
“Why do anything?” is a good sum up for your musings about running. I do think it’s worthwhile to invest in things that we love that we don’t do professionaly. Hobbies have great value and it’s a chance to grow in other areas of our lives. It’s really fun to immerse yourself in something and learn more about it and try to improve.
You know I definitely don’t think it’s a waste of time to commit yourself to a hobby. Who cares if you are “the best”? I think I read that less than 1% of the population runs a marathon in a given year. So even being a “middle of the pack” runner still puts you at a very high level of physical ability over all.
I hope that you surprise yourself at this race. Your training has been going well, but weather is weather and there’s not much you can do about a hot day. I do think if you really commit yourself to doing what your coach says (when you get one) and following Meghann’s advice, you are going to see your performance increase quickly.
For me, I think it would be extremely hard to get motivated to exercise just for the sake of exercising. I *need* a goal to keep motivated.
I HAVE noticed that your posts are coming later in the day or not at all more often than in the past. 🙂 I totally get it! I have the same issue- too many things I want to cram into my little morning window, yet not able/willing to get up any earlier than I already do. I also have been juggling my “activities” and some days opting to blog, others opting to read, others opting to journal, etc…. and also sometimes carving out a little midday break to fit something in that I missed. I’m actually glad you mention this, because if you were somehow still fitting every single thing in (your reading, meditation, the planning, the blogging, the long runs….) I would be seriously questioning if you are superhuman!! 😉 (Which I already kinda think you are… 🙂 )
I used to be very very focused on PRing and accomplishing a sub-4 marathon prior to having kids. Never say never, but I can’t imagine going back to having that level of focus. But I am not the early bird that you are and I need far more sleep. So I just can’t logistically fit in running like I used to and not run myself into the ground. Sometimes I feel like I’ve lost part of my identity. Like, am I still a “runner” if I run 8-12 miles/week? But everyone is so different and this is a fun challenge for you so it’s good to lean into it if it’s fun/enjoyable. I feel so challenged in other areas of my life (career w/ the increase in travel and certainly parenting) so I can’t be challenged anywhere else. So my mileage will stay pretty low for the forseeable future which is fine since I’ve decided to focus on 10k. But I’ve had to learn to set boundaries and say no to things – like my running partner trying to talk me into a 10 mile or marathon! Because I know I really can’t run as much as I’d need to race at those distances.
i smiled while reading your musing on running “addiction”. Well.. I’ve entertained with the same questions and here are my whys:
– running is mental therapy. I’m a happier person when I can run. when i couldn’t for a month after my eye surgery, I was semi-depressed.
– chasing a big PR (BQ ultimately) is a selfcare project that will take years to accomplish if ever. I feel good chasing it because I see it as selfcare as nobody will benefit from my running so much.
– I love how running (or any sport) is one area in life that you see progress as you put into effort. many other things aren’t like that as other factors play a big role (like career progression).
– i feel like i inspire my girls with my consistency into running.. normalizing exercise as daily life necessity just like eating and sleeping.
– inspire others without preaching. People around me over the years have started running/jogging/exercising because they see me first hand being active and productive, thus they feel inspired to try.
i can think many more… hahaha.. so go for it Sarah. Let’s aim to BQ together one day 🙂
I have probably commented something similar before, but more and more with age, I am just grateful to be able to run. It is depressing to watch times get slower and slower, but just the fact that you can do these long runs is amazing. Maybe it’s just that I don’t have a “fast friend” but at 41, I can run more than pretty much everyone I know my age, and I would suspect you could say the same. Just being able to move is a gift! So I say that not to be a discouragement–it’s great to have goals and to want to improve, but I would suspect you’re probably in the top 2% of people your age in terms of running (or something else crazy like that). I wish I could say i have always had such a good attitude…but watching my husband struggle with physical issues and not be able to run at all does help to put it into perspective. Happy running! Your half will be great!