July 13, 2010

the best i can
while cleaning up from dinner/fielding diabetes pages at 8:30 pm last night, guilt mounting because i hadn’t fit in the studying that i wanted to, it dawned on me that maybe i can’t do it all. and, more importantly, perhaps it’s not because i’m lazy or not organizing things right or budgeting my time appropriately. the truth is that there are a finite number of hours in the day, and i really have been trying the best i can to fit everything in.

and really, that’s all anyone can ask of me.

including myself.

my fairy godmother (or so i’ve decided) posted a timely entry last night about being judgmental — not only in regard to others, but with respect to herself. i think that those of us who are attracted to something like the resolution-filled happiness project tend to be a perfectionism-oriented bunch to begin with. and sometimes we all probably just need to chill and forgive ourselves for being (gasp!) normal.

i don’t necessarily think it’s a bad thing to have goals for each day; i just want myself to know that not completing them all doesn’t mean i deserve a big fat F on my own personal report card, or even a B-minus.

i am putting a great deal of energy, thought, and life into my work right now, and working long hours while making time for the few outside things that are most important to me. maybe it’s the sleep deprivation talking, but i’m going to go ahead and award myself an

oh, and these shoes, too.




workout: 4 miles on the TM, 0.5% incline, 9:13/mi pace

clean eating cookthrough: i liked the ‘good meat as accent’, mark bittman-esque vibe of this recipe for cavatappi with spinach-ricotta pesto and (just a touch of) filet mignon.

quality (local, grass-fed) filet does not come cheap . . .

but in a scaled down amount, i felt good about my purchase.

and about this super-easy end-product. i have been so impressed with the recipes in the magazine that we’ve gone through so far! i am going to have to award clean eating an A as well.


  • Reply Anonymous July 13, 2010 at 10:57 am

    What you say reminds me a bit of the idea of the 'good enough mother'. Dreamed up by Winnicott, the child psychotherapist. He suggests that the best mother is precisely _not_ the perfect mother – who is too stifling to let the child develop – but the imperfectly attentive mother, who is nevertheless – and therefore – precisely good enough, quite sufficiently good, paradoxically better than the best. It applies to self-nurturing too I think.

  • Reply sophia July 13, 2010 at 3:36 pm

    I award you an A+ for realizing that! It's so easy to push, push push oneself to insanity, trying to be more productive than one can be within one's circumstances and of course, the limited 24 hour per day time frame. You did the best you can, and that's…well, the best!

  • Reply atilla July 13, 2010 at 9:54 pm

    that looks good enough to make me eat red meat

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