potential

you know when people tell you you have such ‘potential’? i was thinking (while pipetting, yesterday) that this is almost always based on a one-dimensional strength, without consideration of possibly fatal flaws that might throw all potential out the window. for example, lots of people told me that i had music potential, but my inability to sit still for long enough to practice that stuff prevented my from getting truly great. and it might have LOOKED like i had potential to be a great future surgeon based on my grades and test scores in college (and ability to wake up early), but my lack-of-talent (to put it mildly) for remembering where stuff is located in the complicated mess of body we all have — not to mention my lack-of-talent for tolerating lack-of-sleep — obviously makes this an impossibility.

i realize that sometimes it’s okay to do things when you’re not fantastic at them — that’s why i’m still training for marathons, despite my middle-of-the-pack status. but i worry about doing things that are not on the ‘exceptional’ list that are supposed to become careers. right now i wish i felt like i was better at science, in general. maybe i’ll end up with some alterna-career that is science related, but capitalizes on my actual abilities. or maybe my experiments will start working and i’ll have to revise this list.

things that i am (or was) exceptionally good at:

1. singing/music
2. taking tests, especially standardized ones
3. taking notes/writing with nice handwriting
4. getting the word puzzle on the will shortz show on npr (usually)

things that i am pretty good at:

1. writing non serious things, although i’m quite serious about this particular entry
2. teaching kaplan
3. baking

things that i am just okay at — if that:

1. lab (this one worries me)
2. taking care of patients as a med student
3. running (although i am exceptionally good about being disciplined about my training schedule)
4. back in high school: cheerleading. and i so WANTED to be good.

things that i am terrible at:

1. directions – figuring out how to get ANYWHERE
2. seeing without my contacts
3. any sort of sport involving a ball
4. staying up late
5. anatomy