i spent most of that night shift fighting sleep, often losing the battle (although not long enough to enjoy it). at one point i put my head down on the desk and woke up because i drooled onto my knee. i know, i’m disgusting, but i’m sure i’m not the only one who has ever done that. bleahch. in my sleepy stupor, i came to the realization that it is very different being truly NEEDED at 2 am (like a resident on call) vs. being there only for ‘learning purposes’ or just purely for reasons of torture (like me). i’m hoping that the former case might at least make a person feel energized by the fact that they are, like, saving lives. because otherwise, i’m never going to survive my residency.
i did get to see someone cardioverted (shocked with the big paddles like on TV!) during my morning shift yesterday. one minute he was in non-rate-controlled atrial fibrillation, the next — normal sinus! tres grey’s-esque.
2 shifts left! i can’t believe i’ve gotten all mean and tired already after only one month of work. i think it’s because i’m only seeing adults. at least i hope so.