things that are working
✔ planning in fun. outings with friends, dinners with family, date nights. whatever. because i find that if i don’t, then nothing good happens with my [limited] free time.
✔ hiring help. last weekend, things actually didn’t end so well: babysitter/mother’s helper candidate #2 no-showed [the NERVE] and on a day when i really reaaaaaaally was looking forward to a break. it was bad, i melted down, etc. but this weekend — my call weekend — has been much better, and now i have three [three!] seemingly reliable people* who i have met and who i have gotten to watch interact with annabel that i can start to depend on.
i absolutely still get to spend most of my weekends with annabel, but have a built-in 2-3 hr break in addition to her naptimes. until the boards, i plan on doing this on both days when one of us is on call [ie, most weekends]. after that, i’ll go down to one. probably.
i still feel guilty that i am failing at Project Supermom, and i know i have things really REALLY easy in many ways. but with all that said — with the help, i’m much much happier and more relaxed. and therefore, a better and more engaged parent [and, importantly, wife and PERSON] the rest of the time. so, there’s that. also, after 11 years of medical training, i’m done with martyrhood. more on that another time, perhaps.
✔ resting more. yes – probably one of the reasons for fewer posts this past week. but i do feel like i’ve given myself more permission to just CHILL, and that is a good thing. for the most part, i have been running every other morning, not every morning — meaning more sleep. and i have tried to plan some really simple dinners that will still provide reasonable nutrition for the 3 [3.5?] of us.
fun stuff: the details
since i received a couple of requests to share exactly what i have been planning in, here’s a list:
✱ dinner with family. last sunday night, my cousins and their kids came over for a casual burger night. fun! and tonight my inlaws and a’s grandparents [S-I-L, B-I-L, niece, nephew, bebe, poppy] are coming over for takeout that josh will pickup. minimal work, but still totally enjoyable. and one of the major benefits of having moved down here!
✱ play dates. last weekend, i got to meet up with the lovely JT and her little one at cafe bambini, a totally adorable coffee house/toddler play space. it was wonderful! and in a few minutes, i’m headed to the park with my S-I-L and her kids to meet up with another friend and her 2. in addition to the few people i know here, i’m looking forward to trying to meet more with similarly-aged kids. that part IS challenging, though.
other kid outing ideas:
– to a bookstore story hour
– to swim class [annabel is going to start next week i am hoping!]
– to gymboree [though we don’t have a convenient one here]
– to local museums or zoos
✱ prenatal yoga. i haven’t started yet, but have planned on signing up for a tuesday night class that begins in a couple of weeks and lasts through december. and i’ve hired a babysitter, so josh can go out that night [or work out, or finish work late — which is the most likely] on those nights. i’m hoping it will allow me to meet other moms with young children in addition to those currently expecting.
i also kind of want to join a book club, but not until after boards!
✱ visits or travel. i am going to try to lure as many family members/friends here as possible all winter long. hoping that warmth, sunshine, and a VERY sweet girl are enough to get people to come!
✱ just simple family activities. neighborhood run with josh + a followed by a jump in our pool – an amazing morning.
✱ entertainment. i feel lame for admitting this, but it’s so easy for me to fritter away time on the internet [and feel so EMPTY afterwards] that it’s been so much better to plan to watch a tv show or movie. i do love keeping up with a handful of blogs, but it’s the facebook/random surfing that is just so addictive and yet SO unfulfilling. working on transitioning to dedicated reading/movie/tv/etc time.
* based on references as well as demeanor during the mother’s helper sessions
as always, a few recent pix: