Episode #11 will go up this morning — and it might be my favorite so far! It’s our first episode featuring a guest — and a very very special one at that. Siobhan is a brilliant genetics professor and mother of two, and also my treasured friend from our time in NC. We met at a local run club meetup, and sealed our friendship over the coming years with many miles run together.
Our lives have both definitely changed since then, including moves to opposite coasts. When I searched the blog for pictures of us, all I could find were shots taken when one of us was extremely pregnant (2009 it was her; 2012 me!). Still, every time we chat it remains clear that we are the same old type A running nerds that clocked miles over the Tobacco Trail over a decade ago in NC. We have kept in touch, but I definitely miss the days of seeing/hearing from her all the time. Visit soon please, Siobhan!
Anyway, in this episode. we talk (as usual) careers, family, and logistics; we also get into fitness, travel (S’s travel schedule is amazing!), and intentionality. She even motivated me to try to start tracking my time again — something I am interestingly terrible at, despite previous efforts.
If you haven’t listened yet and were wondering where to start, I highly recommend this episode! We will definitely do more ‘guest spots’ in the future, interspersed with our regular style. And feel free to leave any comments/thoughts on this blog, Laura’s blog, or the show’s Instagram!
In other news:
Work musings
I’m on call. But more than halfway through the week (yay!). Despite the fact that I am really trying to stay away from the countdown mindset when it comes to this pregnancy, I cannot help but note that I have 14 total days of call until March. Counting today! This sounds like a lot, actually, but at least it’s finite.
As we get closer to launching our new residency program (we have started interviews! it’s very exciting!), I have done more thinking about the nature of my job, and learning, and balancing both long and short-term responsibilities and goals.
In short: it’s not easy. I found OMDG’s recent post thought-provoking — she notes that when she first started training, she thought her attendings knew it all . . . and is now figuring out that everyone has deficits, some more gaping than others. She is thoughtful about which gaps she wants to makes sure are filled for herself, and sounds like she is going to be an excellent anesthesiologist.
I find myself wanting to have more blank space time at work for keeping up with the latest research, developing my own projects, and the like . . . but it is SO hard to protect that time, and admittedly even harder because I am not willing to work as many hours/week as some others. I am actually incredibly excited that our residency program will force additional study to some extent (preparing to teach = learning!). However, despite my own gaps, I think that I have developed the following (important) skills:
– ability to critically read research studies (though my stats knowledge could definitely improve significantly)
– ability to prioritize and to understand when I can be super-efficient and when I just need to take time with something
– understanding of ‘the system’ and how to get things done
– a fairly deep understanding of the common things I see (growth, diabetes, puberty, etc) and a good sense of how to explain these topics to patients
Do I know everything? HELL NO. Do I wish I could cloister myself away for several weeks and study the latest? Kind of. Do I think I’m doing an overall good job? Yes. Thank you OMDG for helping me do this self-evaluation.
Blank Space
On (ironically, perhaps) the Day Designer Instagram:
Love this. Simple and gets the day started off in the right way for me. Well said, Day Designer Team.
Music Mondays
Yesterday I listened to St. Vincent’s new album MASSEDUCTION on my commute. Love it. I am settling into a new rhythm of music in the mornings and podcasts in the afternoons. This balance seems to suit me and gives me a bit more mind-wandering time, which I really like.
not the most fam-friendly album cover (or lyrics) but . . . I think it’s really well done!
WORKOUT REPORT
Last but not least . . .
Pregnancy week #32
(all runs treadmill. I am not running outside until it’s under 75 degrees which at this rate may never actually happen.)
M – 6 min run (5 mph) / 2 min walk (3 mph) x 5 – 3.2 mi total
T – rest
W – 5 min run (5 mph) / 2 min walk (3 mph) x 5 – 2.8 mi total
R – rest
F – 8 min run (5 mph) / 2 min walk (3 mph) x 3.5 – 3 mi total
S – rest
S – more rest. (it was a rough weekend!)
Going to attempt some barre3 now after quite a hiatus. Definitely a prenatal one though!
10 Comments
Hi Sarah! Semi-long-time reader, (maybe) first-time commenter?
I LOVE the podcast and I have a follow-up question after listening to this morning’s episode, which mostly came to me after hearing Siobhan’s story of her being "on" with the kids because her husband has longer commute/work hours during the week. I know that this is similar to you and Josh since his chosen field is just more demanding of time.
How do you work through the (hopefully few) moments of resenting your husband for the imbalance of time caring for children? Let me explain: Like many of you, my husband’s job is just more demanding than mine from a time and flexibility perspective. I knew this going into the relationship and I knew this when we decided to have a child and I still know it as we consider a second child. These are all conscious choices; we signed up for this. My husband does a lot for our family, but the reality is that I take on more childcare responsibilities than he does (even with some outsourcing). And for the most part, this is fine! But I do occasionally have these moments of resentment because it’s just not…fair. Do you have advice for working through these moments? Thanks for considering!
(PS – I am a genetic counselor so was very happy to hear from a genetics professor today! Though I know that had nothing to do with her actual content on the podcast…ha!)
I LOVE THIS QUESTION! I need to give it deep thought. Thank you!!
For you listener question: most daycares offer before and after school care, as well as snowday, other days off/breaks, and summer. The price is less than full-time care is. Love the podcast!
And I should have mentioned this, but the bus does drop off/pick up just like at your house.
Yes! I came here specifically to comment on what Amanda said — I was very surprised that neither the question asker or either of you ladies knew about before/after school care! I assumed before/after school care was available in most places…unless you live in a really rural area maybe? Is this not true?
My daughter just started kindergarten this year and after school, she gets walked across the street along with a bunch of other kids to a gym and after school facility and is there for a few hours until my husband or I picks her up. For us in suburban Houston, it’s about half the cost of full-time daycare. (They also have before school for those who need to be at work earlier than you can drop them off at school).
I think the reason Laura and I didn’t mention this was that it seemed TOO obvious – ie if this were available she would have said so 🙂 But you’re right – maybe there ARE options like this in her area and she just didn’t know to look for them!
I know our public schools offer after school until at 5 (not 6) but there are programs at local youth center + JCC that are until 6 that can be great options for many families.
Hey Sarah! I’ve been loving the podcast! Great episode this week! I actually need to start thinking about aftercare for my daughter next year because she’s going into Kindergarten. Our daycare does have the after school program so we may go that route. Our situation is this- my husband is a commercial pilot and has a completely random schedule every month, so we never know when he’ll be home or away til about 12 days before the next month starts (you may remember that I think we met at HLS years ago, because I used to blog at Life in a Holding Pattern). I work full time 8am-5pm M-F. I don’t have a ton of flexibility in my hours. My in-laws recently moved to the area and are willing to help out, but because I’ve been doing everything by myself so long, I’ve found it kind of difficult to give up some of the work (and because I’m a control freak!). So, even though we probably wouldn’t need after school care EVERY day, it would probably be easiest to just schedule it in case and then if my husband is off and able to get her he can, or the in-laws. We’ll have to see.
Also, I have found that raising two smalls kids has caused a lot of marital stress for me and my husband, especially in the first year of each of our kids’ lives. We have a lot of the issues you have already brought up in the podcasts- struggle to divide childcare/household tasks/etc equally, struggle to make time for each other a priority, just tons of stress on the marriage from raising little kids.
I look forward to future episodes. I’d be willing to be a guest if you need someone, although I hate hearing my own voice recorded…haha!
Quick question for Siobhan – why could she not run in Ethiopia? I found her statement interesting considering Ethiopians are known for running 🙂
Hello Sarah! I have been enjoying your podcasts!
I was intrigued by your comment in the podcast (was it this one? I just binged four episodes, so I can’t remember to which one I’m referring )about how you take networking phone calls in the car, and wanted to ask if you have any other ways that you make commuting/ driving carpool more bearable or useful. Before I had kids, I rode my bike or took public transportation everywhere and commuting didn’t seem like such a time suck. With the former, I figured I was getting my excercise, with the latter, got a lot of reading done. However, life, marriage, move to suburbs, and now I feel like I am spending a lot of time in my car, and we live outside of a major city, so there is always traffic. I loathe driving-I didn’t have a car until my daughter was eight months old (My husband did all the daycare pick ups and drop offs even though my work was closer to daycare. Then one day he said to me: "You have a kid, it’s time you get a car and a smart phone. It’s the responsible thing to do." He wasn’t wrong.") This year, my 5 year old was accepted to a magnet program at a school eight miles away, so I drive her to school 23 mins each way, meaning I spend about two hours a day in the car (drive her there and back and the repeat for pick up, not to mention after school activities). I’m currently on maternity leave, but when I go back to work, I will have a 30 min commute one way. Things I have done – audiobooks, podcasts (just binged yours), pump (this is actually a great time saver). Would love to hear your thoughts and tricks for making carpool and commuting less of a soul sucking experience. (My friend was telling me about a start up that is like a cross between care.com and uber for kids- I think I would love this, though cost is always a factor)
Also – I am thinking when I go back to work I may put my child on the magnet program bus, but then she will be on the bus for over an hour one way. Or I can put her in before/after care, but I feel that would make an equally long day since she would be there from 8am-5pm. Any tips or thoughts for how to help her cope? (I know your kids are still young, but wondered if you had any thoughts? My mother was always able to set her schedule to be home until my brother was old enough for us to be latch key kids, so the whole bus experience is foreign to me)
Curious about the online barre workout. Do you love it and have you noticed a change? i love studio classes, but with two little kids and a full time job it’s so hard to carve out that time to get there, take a 60 min class and drive home. I’m wondering if it’s worth subscribing. Thanks!