it’s not always easy

February 10, 2010

perspective. perspective. perspective.
okay, i’ll just come out and admit it: i’m feeling totally stressed out and overwhelmed right now. operation yoga + wine was a total fail, as my partner in crime came down with a wicked case of what looked like food poisoning, and i didn’t get out of the hospital until 30 minutes after yoga class started.


no matter how much i try to corral everything into to-do lists and plan things in manageable stages, my head is swimming with half a dozen projects and commitments [research proposal! senior talk! QI project! morning case report! procedure issues! medical licensure stuff! BOARDS!] and it just feels overwhelming. i need TIME to work on these things, and i don’t see any peaceful blocks up ahead in the near-enough future.

my parents-in-law are coming this weekend (hi B + S!), which is wonderful, except it necessitates an apartment cleanup, and i feel like josh and i are going to be terrible hosts since we will both be working half the weekend. i miss josh, who is on nights again, and there is some career stuff (his, not mine) that is eating away at me daily and won’t be resolved for at least a couple of months.

my patient team right now is large and doesn’t show signs of shrinking, and i will be playing “resitern” for the next 2 mornings. i feel like i don’t know the details of all of the patients as well as i would like to, and i hate that.

finally, the weather is completely disgusting and i seem to have lost the motivation to get up early to work out, which is usually the only thing that keeps me going in times like these.

IT’S OFFICIAL. I’M STRESSED OUT.

and, i feel horrible about even writing that, because hello? i’m taking care of kids with cancer, and this happened not even a month ago. perspective. perspective. PERSPECTIVE, for #($*&$’s sake.

omg. okay. so.
wow, that just all came flowing out. guess i probably could have used that yoga class last night, huh? i am sitting here right now trying to breathe and take things one step at a time, and i will try my best to do that today.

wish me luck.

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2.9.10

workout: none [SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I DON’T RUN? endorphins are like my prozac.]

i thought that eating some of this for dinner might help:

but really, it didn’t (it was delicious, though). with some crackers + baba ghanoush, i almost had all 4 food groups . . .

reading: no.