still alive

July 3, 2012

intact
i seem to have survived day #3 back at work.  mondays are hard:  i spend the morning over in lab, and then drive back to durham to attend meetings from 2 – 6.  except that now it’s more like 2:30 – 5:40, because i have to get to day care before closing time!  granted, these hours still aren’t strenuous as far as the medical lifestyle goes — at all.  but it’s hard to stay engaged sometimes for so many hours of meetings in a row!  and sometimes . . . well, sleep happens.  and it’s embarrassing.

i was very worried about this possibility today, as a. was up to eat at 12a and 4a.  not TERRRRIBLE [and i’m aware it could be much, MUCH worse!], but obviously not ideal.  it’s odd, but it seems she sleeps so much better on nights after day care!  i can’t attribute it to milk intake because i’ve been able to eke out enough to match her so far [though it takes me 5 sessions to pump enough for her 3 bottles].  i suppose it’s ‘stimulation’, although the weekend was a lively one with visits from a’s cousins and she certainly seemed stimulated to me!

  

probably similar to the day care experience, actually!

anyway, i can’t fault her completely because i chose to squeeze in a run this morning.  it’s a trade-off, but sometimes the endorphins seem to enhance my mood/energy more than the equivalent time spent sleeping.

in the end, though, i wasn’t just awake today — i was slightly wired.  i think that i’m running on a combination of “I CAN DO THISSSS!” adrenaline, combined with hormones and a little brute force. it reminds me of when i would start a new [hard] rotation during residency — those first few call nights were never that bad!  and then . . . well, sometimes things didn’t remain so cheery.

hopefully i can continue to ride this wave until a’s sleep patterns get a little more sorted out!  we’ll see . . .

various items
1.  i don’t think my two-planner system is going to work [i had bought a separate one for work to help plan out my days].  as much as i’d love to keep work separate, it’s not reality and i need everything in one place!!  i’m just going to make the little one suffice.

2.  hey look, dinner:

salmon [improvised honey-mustard rub], broccoli, grains-in-a-bag.  i think this no-work meal might become our monday standard . . .

3.  just unpacking my bags and washing necessary pump parts took 20 precious minutes at the sink today after work.  hoping i can get faster . . .

4.  run today:  3.5 miles in 30 minutes.  this was a very interrupted tempo run, with the last 8 minutes done at 8:00/mi pace to conveniently add in a mile after a’s breakfast.  [or second breakfast, since she had the first at 4am . . .]

5.  about to watch a little of last night’s gymnastics trials [while pumping] and then pass out.  goal is BED BEFORE 9.  here goes!

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