As I have mentioned, my survival mechanism right now is to focus on each day. It is absolutely a coping mechanism to zero in on habits and tasks. It can be rewarding, too. It is fun to meet goals and check off boxes.
It can also be a recipe for a little tooooo much obsession with living in some sort of unachievable (and arbitrarily chosen!) “perfect” way.
Gretchen Rubin refers to a concept of Upholder tightening, which is when Upholders become more and more rigid about a set of (often self-imposed) rules. There may be an element of this. If you have too many rules for yourself, it can become impossible (or at best — just very tiring!) to always be following them all.
Things I found myself chastising myself for yesterday:
1- spending time looking at Instagram (primarily my planner/bujo feed). I get so many ideas there and it’s fun. Screen Time says it was 54 minutes. Which is perhaps not ideal, but it’s not disgusting either.
2- eating more processed food than is ideal (which I don’t do all that often so . . . should it really be a big deal?)
3- not having the energy to clean up our house perfectly
4- not getting up early enough to have finished my workout before the kids were awake (I did finish it but the last ~25 minutes were interrupted by getting G breakfast, etc)
5- trying to get the kids (well, particularly G) to play independently so that I don’t have to stand over them 24/7
6- not getting in 10K steps (we did not take a walk — only swam — and it’s actually kind of amazing I still got in 6400 steps merely chasing the kids around the house)
7- not being able to prevent toddler tantrums or remain 100% zen/patient while they occur
I am looking back at the pictures and clearly it wasn’t a terrible day. But I had (mostly) negative thoughts.
Going to try to work on that today.
PS: Happy 4th of July. Not feeling very patriotic this year. Maybe I will feel better about this country on November 4th.