So about ~20 minutes after hitting “publish” yesterday, where I had written about having such a lovely day, I thought my life might be over.
I pulled into our driveway with A&G post-gymnastics and it was dark out; this detail is notable because I don’t do a lot of driving in the dark, but it’s now pretty dark by 7:30 when their classes end (plus I had stopped at the ATM, so things took longer). I started to get out of the car, failing to realize I had not put the car in park and for whatever reason, I had not engaged the emergency brake.
(That part is weird because I almost always use the emergency brake, but for whatever reason this time I didn’t.)
Anyway, as I was getting out I realized the car was moving backwards — rather slowly, but significantly — and wasn’t stopping, and my kids were in there. I tried to jump back in to put the brakes on but didn’t make it and ended up under the door with the car continuing to roll back towards me. Honestly for a moment I was so sad and in shock thinking that this was how my life was potenitially going to end, or be changed forever due to some severe crush jury.
The car door smashed into my leg and threw me backwards onto the ground with the force of the car moving back but I managed to push back with my arms to slow it. A was very smart and jumped out of the car to help push forward with me – if she hadn’t I’m not sure I could have stopped it. G got out of her carseat and we screamed for her to stay back, which thankfully she did. Ultimately a neighbor heard me and I was able to get out, and Josh came out (he hadn’t heard me initially) and then finally we got the car stopped. It was halfway down the driveway but hadn’t gotten far.
ANYWAY. The paramedics came and I was extremely shaken up, but we decided against the ER becuase my vitals were stable and Josh didn’t think it was likely that I had any internal injuries (both from my exam and the mechanism. The car itself did not roll over me!). I have a very bruised up thigh/upper knee with some swelling and pain (and weirdly some numbness along the front – Josh thinks I damaged some cutaneous nerve), but I can walk and nothing seems to be fractured, no ligaments torn or anything. I have some very unattractive road rash on my hip and shoulder. My back hurts a lot because I think I really strained it pushing the car. But I am okay!
I oscillate between feeling depressed about being in pain and not being able to run or move around easily, and then being incredibly grateful that it wasn’t worse + that everyone is okay. The more I think about it the more it is the latter. And from a practical/less “woe-is-me” standpoint, if healing takes a longer time and my training is derailed, I can always do a race further out. I’m hoping things will heal more quickly but if not, there’s no tragedy here. It’s not like I reached some magical point in training that I’ll never achieve again.
So. All that to say: I am very glad I’m still here. I do keep reliving the moment and it’s still scary but I imagine it will fade with time. I decided to write about it because it would be hard to NOT write about it, and despite feeling mortified about the whole thing, it is what it is. SO HAPPY the only one hurt was me, and not in a severe or permanent way (I hope). I could not live with myself if one of the kids had been harmed. I don’t think I will ever make that mistake again, though.
I will spare you all a picture of my bruised and banged up parts.
PS: I did go to work yesterday, because I felt like I could (since I can walk; it hurts but is bearable), because it would be a huge pain to move patients, and because I thought being forced to move around might prevent too much stiffness from setting in.
69 Comments
Oh Sarah, what a horrible thing to happen. So glad that you and the kids are safe.
Omg, so terrifying! So glad your kids are ok and your injuries aren’t more serious. Wishing you a quick and smooth recovery! Exposure to this sort of almost life changing incident is tough even when uninjured. We had a health scare with my youngest last year and even though he’s fine in the end, I felt down for months afterward. Really affected my worldview and I feel guilty about it because in the end nothing bad actually happened.
Oh gosh, take care of yourself. A very wise pal told me after a scary beach incident that I needed to keep the story going when thinking about it. So your brain naturally stops at the scariest point, where something horrific might have happened, when actually you have to play it through all the way to the end, where you were safe, your kids were safe, etc. I think writing about it as a way of processing is really smart.
Just a perspective, as you oscillate…. I think it’s perfectly normal (and reasonable!) to feel both– i.e. grateful all turned out okay and wasn’t worse, and also depressed by the changes/pain it will bring to your life short-term at the same time. Feeling depressed about it affecting your training and ability to do what you want with your body doesn’t take away from feeling grateful it wasn’t worse– honestly it IS frustrating to not be able to do what you want with your body (for those of us usually able to, it’s indeed good perspective when we can’t!) so give yourself permission to feel both thankful and sad/depressed at the same time, without feeling guilty. I am glad you’re okay, and also annoyed for the impact on your life and training, esp as you finally get the cooler temps and I don’t even know you (:
First. I’m so sorry this happened. How traumatic and scary for your whole family.
Second, I’m so glad you’re (generally) okay.
Third, I will say that all the feelings (fear, disappointment over impacts to running) etc are all normal and it’s okay to feel the full range of emotions.
Thanks for sharing both as a sobering reminder to remain vigilant around matters of car safety and also as a helpful way for you to process what happened. I think Coree’s advice is so wise – following the memories through to the end.
Take care my friend.
Oh gosh – so sorry this happened, but so very glad you and the children are ok. Sending quick healing vibes to you – your current physical fitness has to count for something!
That’s a terrible story-but look-you jumped back in to save your babies. And then one of them came and saved you! 🥺Thank you for sharing and hope you continue to feel ok as time goes on. Play some Tetris and have both kids do it (look it up-helps with moving forward from traumatic incidents!)
Oh my goodness Sarah!! So glad you are okay! And I appreciate your perspective about the only one being hurt and (sounds like) in a not severe/permanent way – though of course that would be tough considering you’re thinking about all the effort you’ve put into training. I hope you heal quickly!
That’s terrifying!!! Sending healing thoughts and hugs to you down I-95. I’m glad everyone is okay in the strictest sense, even though, I’m sure, none of you are really feeling okay right now.
My husband has twice left the car in drive when we’ve pulled into a parking spot, and he’s popped out to run into a store, leaving the rest of us in the car. Fortunately in both cases I’ve been in the front seat, and been able to quickly throw the car in park, but it was scary both times. I think it’s probably a more common accident than people realize.
These hard moments in life do give us perspective, but I’m sorry you had to go through this experience. glad to hear the kids are ok and that you’re not seriously injured. wishing you a speedy recovery , get lots of rest and try to enjoy your time off training, maybe use it to do something fun.
Oh my gosh, Sarah, that is TERRIFYING. Thank God you and the kids are OK. I’m so sorry you had that experience, but thank you for sharing and offering that perspective. Praying that you heal quickly. <3
So glad you are ok and hope you’re feeling so much better soon. The whole thing sounds terrifying. Look after yourself. Xx
Yowza! So glad to hear that everyone is safe. I forgot to put the car in park recently, and although I figured it out before getting out of the car, I was so surprised I made that a mistake. So you’re definitely not the only one.
Refuah shleimah!!!
I’m so glad you’re (mostly) okay!!! I can absolutely imagine how terrifying this must have been. I recently had a minor “forgot to put the car in park” incident too (though nothing remotely similar). I was talking on the phone through my car while driving and pulled into a spot at the grocery store. I then pushed the button on the screen to “hang up” the call, and I guess my brain thought I had pushed the button to put my van in park. (My new van has buttons for drive, park, etc.). It was a little mental confusion I guess due to the similar action needed for both. But my van was NOT in park and started rolling forward toward the other car parked in front of me. Fortunately I was still sitting there and immediately hit the brake before my car hit the other one. Again, totally not the same and no injury of any kind, but I also remember being flustered that it even happened…
OMG how scary!! Definitely give yourself grace and space to feel all the feels and to heal (physically and emotionally). I suspect all your marathon training will help your body bounce back fairly quickly, but it’s definitely ok to mourn the interruption in training for something you’ve worked so hard for!
One of my kids saw me get badly hurt years ago, and one thing we found helpful was to let her process her experience out loud with us. She was pretty traumatized, and we didn’t clue into that until a few days later, but once we did we made sure to give her space to process and helped her name some of what she was feeling. It helped her let go of the guilt she was feeling about being there and not being able to help me.
OMG terrifying, and best wishes for a complete recovery, mental and physical.
Sarah I’m so glad you are ok!!! This exact scenario happened to my brother and me when my mom was 8 months pregnant with my brother. Our driveway was a very steep hill and there was a gully across the street, so I can imagine my mom was terrified. Honestly I don’t know exactly how she managed to stop the car (I was 8, my brother was 7) but I do remember her yelling and running alongside the car, very pregnant, holding the door open trying to stop the car. I’m so glad everyone was ok, although shaken up. You must have been overtired/worn out to forget, so I hope you give yourself some TLC for a few days and rest and recover.
Sarah, I’m so sorry this happened to you. So terrifying! I’m so glad you are all (mostly ok) and sending you good vibes for a quick recovery. We recently got an electric car and 1) you don’t have to put it in park when you stop and 2) it turns off when the driver gets out of the seat. It seems technology is moving forward to hopefully prevent this happening in the future. When I drive our other car, I sometimes forget to put it in park and/or turn it off 😕. So don’t feel bad for making this mistake- I do think it is probably more common than you think!
The same thing happened to a friend of mine years ago, only the car rolled forward and ended up sort of trapping her knee between the door and a tree. Terrifying! Like you, she was shaken up but not seriously injured (really bruised and sore). I hope you heal quickly.
When my first son was really young (read: I was tired), I pulled into the garage and just forgot to stop. I wasn’t going super fast but I definitely drove right into the cabinets that are at the back of our garage and seriously damaged the doors to them. I remember my husband asking how it happened and all I could come up with was “I forgot to stop, I guess? I’m not really sure?”
Even though your kids are older now and you aren’t in that postpartum sleep deprivation phase, I do think that sometimes our mom brains just get overloaded by all the things and small, seemingly automatic actions just get…forgotten. It’s a very strange thing but definitely something that we can all relate to, I think! (silver lining, I guess, is that I guarantee this will never ever happen to you again!)
Totally agree on the mom brain not having space for everything!
My first baby is now 7 months old and even though he’s sleeping through the night most of the time now I feel significantly dumber/more forgetful than before. Then I remind myself that I am literally ALWAYS keeping track of when the last time he ate/slept/pooped and when the last time I pumped was. I’m also usually thinking about a million other little things that I never had to before, like if we need to buy him new clothes and if what foods do we need to introduce him to to check for allergies. It’s a lot to have constantly running in the back of my head and while I know that specifics will change as he grows, I think that a part of my brain real estate is just going to be devoted to “mom things” for the foreseeable future.
Anyways, so so sorry this happened to you Sarah! Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
So scary! Glad you and the kids are ok. Last Oct, after parking on the street, I was on the passenger side getting my bags out of the car when a car hit mine on the driver side with some speed, causing my own car to hit me. Similarly, I also walked away super bruised but nothing seriously wrong with me (though the car was totaled). Like you, I felt nothing but overwhelming gratitude. Take the time you need to heal your body and mind. It is ok to not be your usual productive self for a bit as you process what happened.
((hugs)) and healing headed your way.
Sarah, I am so sorry to hear that this happened. Glad that your children are okay and so thankful that your injuries aren’t worse.
My jaw dropped when I was reading your post this morning because this happened to me when I was a child with my mom! Similar story, coming home at night after a long day and my mom went to run packages into the house and she had thought the car was in park. My sister and I were both in the car and the car began rolling down our driveway. My sister jumped out of the car and I was sleeping in the back and thankfully, the car slowly rolled onto the grass of my neighbor’s front yard. I imagine my Mom must have felt such panic and trauma about the whole event. We all were thankfully fine but you better believe, 30 something years later, I am crazy about using my parking brake (which my husband always jokes with me about.
I hope that you can take a bit of time off to care for yourself, both physically and emotionally. You have been through something real and you will be back to yourself shortly but give yourself a little bit of time and rest. What KGC wrote about also really resonated with me. As Moms, we often have so much going on, internally and externally, that these things happen. For me, I have crashed my car twice into the side of my garage in a one month time span so I definitely definitely get it!
So glad you are okay! That’s a very scary event. I’ve also had some perspective inspiring moments this week so really appreciate you writing it about it!
That sounds so terrifying. I’m so glad it all worked out okay, and that you have such a quick-thinking kiddo. I hope your recovery is swift.
Just echoing others in that I am sorry you went through this and so happy everyone is okay. Wishing you a speedy recovery and definitely feel all the feelings! Many things can be true about a situation. Sending hugs!
Such a scary situation – so glad everyone is okay! Wishing you a speedy recovery!
Oh no, how scary. I’m so glad you are fine and see the latter view of things. In the big scale, nothing really happened except some bruises and unforgettable lesson. Also you get a taste of how fragile it is our normal happy life. Nothing is granted. I’m so relieved to know all well and you are still with high spirit.
First, we are all very glad you are still here too!
My therapist tells me that humans are complex and that we have the ability and it is natural to hold two opposing feelings at once (depressed & grateful). This compared to all or nothing thinking and feeling.
I am grateful you are okay and very sad that your training may be derailed. Love that you are able to focus on enjoying the journey (training) and not have too much focus on the destination (a specific marathon).
Side note – we have one EV and one standard vehicle. The EV fully stops when you take off the gas. There have been some scary moments when switching from the EV to standard vehicle of taking of the gas and assuming it will stop and it doesn’t! Bonus – The EV does put itself in park if you open the door.
Sending lots of love your way!
So sorry to hear this…but you are very brave sharing your story in midst of the pain and after going thru that horrific event. Praying for your speedy recovery. Hang in there my friend, you are too precious to us all and ofcourse to your loved ones.
Oh my gosh I am so happy you are ok. Praying you feel better and recovered asap <3
Such a terrifying accident – I’m so glad you are okay and that the kids weren’t hurt! Definitely a mama bear moment to keep your kids safe <3 Hope you have a smooth road to recovery.
Wow, how scary, but glad everyone is ok <3.
I am so incredibly sorry to hear that! That is so scary and traumatic, and I hope you and the girls can all take some time to recover from what happened. Sending you healing thoughts.
Oh Sarah, how scary!! It’s so scary how quickly something can go from mundane to really dangerous — you are not alone in that experience and it doesn’t mean you were thoughtless. I’m so so thankful to hear you are fine and the kids are too. I hope you heal quickly. Thank you for being willing to share this with us and I hope that it looms less in your mind each day, but do consider a therapy appointment to process if you feel you could benefit from it.
Sarah, I am sorry this happened and so happy you and your kids are okay. Thinking about you and wishing you a speedy recovery.
Sarah, I’m so sorry you had such a terrifying experience. I hope you are able to recover smoothly both physically and emotionally – and your kids as well, because this must have been scary for them as well. I know you recently wrote about feeling anxious about news elsewhere in the world, and feeling that way is even harder when we have a sudden reminder of how easily our own lives can be upended. Take care of yourself, give yourself grace, and get lots of hugs from your kids.
Omg Sarah. I almost never comment but popped over to read today on a quick break and just had to say I’m so glad you’re ok. Please take care in the coming days! Sometimes the shock of these things sets in slowly. Sending love and healing vibes from Toronto!
Wow, Sarah, this is so hard. I’m so sorry that it happened for you. I know you said you are mortified, but you shouldn’t be embarrassed! Accidents happen! It is so so good that everyone is (mostly) okay. I’m so sorry that you are pretty banged up. I can only imagine how frustrating that feels given how much time and effort you’ve put into your training. But if you’re mostly bruised I am guessing you’ll bounce back pretty quickly. Plus, the mental benefits you’ve gained from your training aren’t going anywhere.
I hope you can be gentle with yourself (this was an accident and everyone is okay) as you let yourself heal. I also hope your physical injuries fade quickly. Hugs.
So sorry that happened to you, and glad there are no major injuries. I appreciate you sharing though because it’s a good reminder to all of us to stay focused on the task at hand. I know I zone out a lot of times during the routine tasks and incidents can happen that way, and this is something that could have happened to me.
So sorry to hear this happened, how traumatic. So glad your injuries are not too bad (though natural to feel a bit down about the pain and time to recovery), and that you have such a good perspective. Good on A for jumping out and helping push the car! Good reminder to us all to check we’ve done those autopilot things to do with cars – its so easy to miss them some days.
I’m so sorry this happened and hope you recover quickly. We had something really scary happen with one of our kids a few years ago, and it is hard to describe what that feeling is like until you’re living it. So glad you all are okay!!
Oh Sarah! I’m so glad you weren’t hurt worse and the girls are okay. That must have been so scary. Thinking of you and sending calm healing vibes!
Oh my goodness–I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’m just so amazed how positive you are about it! I would have been so terrified and not sure I could have reacted at all. I will be thinking of you and hoping for a speedy recovery!
So glad it wasn’t worse, and I hope you feel better soon!
Oh Sarah, this sounds so frightening. I hope the physical damage heals quickly. And that the mental repeats of the really frightening part subside.
As others have said – playing the story through to the safe end helps. And it sounds like you and A stopped a moving car – superwomen?
Accidents happen, that sounds so trite, but it is true. Please do not feel mortified. Be kind to your bruised self and rest well.
Sarah! That is so terrifying! I am glad that you are ok and didn’t suffer serious bodily harm but how traumatic for all of you!! I agree with others’ comments about mom’s brains and how easy it can be to make a little mistake like this. I can imagine you were thinking through everything that needed to be done before you could go to bed.
Thinking of you and hoping you heal fast!
Such a scary experience! So glad you’re okay, and sending healing vibes. Be kind to yourself while you recover.
Oh Sarah, I got chills reading this. So glad things turned out ok. We’ve all had moments of autopilot while in a car as others have mentioned. Hope you have a quick recovery.
Oh wow – so scary and I am glad you and the kids are all ok! Hope your recovery is speedy. Kudos to you and A for your quick thinking, bravery, and strength! Freak accidents like this happen and you both rose to the occasion.
I was so sorry to read this, how incredibly stressful. Amazing in-the-moment problem solving from you and your oldest, I’m so glad no one is seriously injured.
Oh Sarah, what a frightening experience. I thought that it was quite impressive of A to help.
So sorry to her about this terrifying experience and glad you are okay (or at least okayish). Hope you can take some time for mental and physical rest this weekend.
Sarah, thank you so much for sharing and I’m so glad you’re (mostly) ok! We had something similar happen but I was in the car (passenger seat) with the kids, and even though I didn’t realize what was happening and why we were rolling back, my oldest child did and saved the day by yelling for me to put the car in park. So this stuff happens and you’re great for dealing with it in the best way you were able to.
Sending you support and hugs. Your comment section is a testament to the community you have built and hopefully is an encouragement to you!
So glad to hear you and the kids are okay! Hoping for a speedy recovering for you!
Oh Sarah – so sorry this happened and so glad the girls are OK and you’re not more seriously injured (even though it sounds super painful still!) I am in awe of how both you and A reacted quickly to prevent what could have been a much more serious accident – you’re both amazing! And G is amazing too for not getting out of the car, so scary!
I’m a physician with ER experience and this type of accident happens a lot more than we think and is terrifying!
Sending all of you hugs and hope you feel better soon! ❤️
PS. I don’t think I’ve ever commented before but I’ve been reading you blog DAILY since about 2010 so you practically feel like extended family now 😅
Oh gosh Sarah, how scary. I’m so sorry this happened, and think all of your emotions around it are perfectly normal and to be expected!
Really pleased you will be okay (hopefully very soon!) and that the kids are okay.
Sending gentle hugs
Also sending care and hugs. A reminder of how fast things can change. On a slightly more positive note, how great that you are and that you live with a doctor.
I have done something similar before!! I am so glad you are OK.
Wow! Sounds frightful – so happy you are all OK. It’s amazing how quickly you kicked into problem solving mode to protect your children. I love your perspective to avoid pity and sadness. Hoping for a speedy recovery!
Sending good thoughts to you and your family! I hope you make a swift recovery
So very sorry! Glad you are okay!
This is so, so scary!!! I’m so glad you’re okay, and this is a good reminder for all of us. We’ve all made little mistakes like this, and sometimes they can have huge consequences- luckily this turned out to be just a frightening experience and temporary (HOPEFULLY) setback. Sounds like you don’t have any real injuries- fingers crossed.
I am so sorry this happened to you. Thank goodness you and your children are okay. Best wishes for a speedy recovery.
How scary, Sarah! I am surprised you were even able to get out of the car without the brake being engaged – aren’t cars smarter than this these days? I am so glad your kids are ok and that you are mostly ok, too, although I am sure the bruising hurts. Hoping for a speedy recovery!
It would have been really nice if it were smarter – but nope. I do not think I will ever make that mistake again though
Sarah, I am so sorry this happened, but so glad you and your kids are ok! Thank you for sharing; this could have been any of us. I know I often feel so scattered as I am leaving work, picking up kids, thinking about the next activity to get to, what items we need for it, all the other things lingering in my ongoing mental to-do list, etc. I hope you recovery quickly ❤️