Yesterday was lovely (from a personal standpoint; the news speaks otherwise and I did not fully immerse myself in it but did not entirely avoid, either. For what it’s worth).
ANYWAY. I am not planning to do a lot of writing here on the current state of affairs and I still maintain that constant news consumption is not good for ANYONE’S sanity, including mine. But — for the record — I plan on doing more self-education, working on my own children’s anti-racism education, and reading from this circulated list. I encourage you to check it out if you haven’t already.
(Side note: I also personally feel called to do some work/study on racial disparities in the field of medicine in which I practice. So important and yes — I’ve seen it happen, where certain treatments seem to be reserved more for those with certain demographic features. I don’t necessarily want to go into specifics but . . . if I am able to get something published I will certainly share!)
All of that said — yesterday was lovely. And that is actually — well, I guess I want to express that there have been many days throughout my now 8-years-long parenting journey when I really did not enjoy many weekend days. Things felt overwhelming. I didn’t feel like there was any time left for me unless I specifically arranged childcare, and then I felt torn/guilty about it.
Somehow things have improved. I think it has to do with one major factor: TINCTURE OF TIME. As in — the kids are getting older. Even G can (and does) entertain herself and I don’t have to be hovering over a kid every waking moment of the day. I am writing this post right now while G&C are sleeping and A is eating breakfast. Yesterday Josh and I managed back to back workouts (I did BB and then he ran) while the kids played.
I recognize we are hitting a sweet spot (no infants / no puberty!) AND that it’s actually easier to manage 3 kids when you aren’t trying to fit in (any) outside activities. But I’m pretty thrilled to be enjoying life more than I did when I had babies. I know that isn’t true for everyone but it is true for me!
(This post partially inspired by a dream I had last night that I was pregnant with #4, accidentally. It was . . . just woah. And I was glad it was a dream.)
Today’s plans:
❏ BB Workout (short cardio flow today – only 30 min!)
❏ 3 more months of photobook pix (I did Jan – March yesterday!)
❏ grocery shop / meal meal plan
❏ kids outside again
❏ create monthly goals
❏ YNAB
❏ read more of Moscow
❏ donate rest of May’s charitable giving budget to anti-racism fund
(Got all of yesterday’s list done PLUS a DIY mani-pedi!)
(G is wearing a white shirt of C’s as a “doctor coat”)
8 Comments
Yay for good weekend days. And thank you for posting on weekends – I love waking up to a new blog post. I am sure the streak can’t continue forever but I have appreciated it!
I’m so glad to hear you say that things are getting better! I love how honest you are about your life and how you don’t sugar coat things to pretend it’s all perfect.
I have a newly turned 3 year old and 1 year old and just ugh, most of our weekends are not enjoyable. We feel like the kids are exhausting for one person to watch and breaks we do give our spouse never seems long enough. We’re constsntly keeping the baby away from messing up sisters toys, pulling her hair etc. and so much interrupting and screaming and whining and ugh 🙁 it’s been hard to find the joy in these parenting days. I’ve had multiple people tell me oh it doesn’t get better, big kids big problems and that just makes me want to break down in tears. I’m sure it’s true but not being able to do a single basic thing for yourself all day without pre-planning (eating, bathroom etc) is beyond exhausting.
Okay end rant, thank you for all that you share
Rachel – I have both big and little kids and I disagree with the “it doesn’t get easier” line. Sure, big kids have different problems – the emotional outbursts or school woes can be really hard – but you can leave the house. You can read a book without worrying someone will stick a fork in her eye. There is not the minute by minute sense of being on. So there is a light at the end of the tunnel for that.
I also strongly disagree that it doesn’t get better! My oldest is six and my youngest is two so while yes, I have found the “bigger kids, bigger problems” thing to be somewhat true (holy cow, the emotions of a new kindergartner have NOTHING on toddler tantrums, which is not something anyone ever talks about), there is a LOT to be said for the physical, “always on” burden of parenting lifting as they get older. I can reason with my big kid, or tell her that I need some space or time to myself and she accepts if,even if she doesn’t always understand it. She takes care of a lot of her own stuff, from getting snacks to readying for bed to buckling into the car. The mental burden + physical duress reducing will give you back the capacity to deal with their stuff more readily.
I also love your weekend posts! Thanks for continuing to share.
Our kids are almost six and almost two, and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. There have been a LOT of long days these past couple of months, and we have had zero childcare. Our littlest a pretty good toddler, as far as toddlers go, but it is still a busy, exhausting time. I keep reminding myself that things will probably never be this hard again.
Thank you for the link. So many good resources to check out. I think it’s clear you’re doing the best you can and that’s all we can ask of ourselves, right?
Whoops not meant to be a reply to that comment, that’s what I get for commenting on my phone!
fully agreed with the joyful parenting moments when kids can entertain themselves. My girls 4 and 8 entertain themselves 90% of the time which leaves me ME time and reading time. I love this stage.