M: 6.5 mi @ 9:20/mi (some strides at end of run)
T: 8.05 mi @ 9:27/mi. Wore knee compression brace which did seem to help.
W: 7.57 mi @ 9:44/mi. Chill run in the rain . . . again a bit of pain around mile 4 which dissipated. Wore brace again.
R: 8.6 mi @ 9:16/mi. Didn’t seem to need brace! Some mile pain around mile 4 which again went away. I did this one in (old, 300 mile) AlphaFlys just because I wanted to remember what running in fast shoes feels like.
F: 6 mi @ 9:52/mi, very chill. Again no brace and pain wasn’t bad!
S: 12.17 mi @ 9:58/mi average but . . . lot of pain last ~5 miles. It was during this run that I realized that the idea of even potentially racing 26 miles in 3 weeks on a compromised leg still causing significant pain during routine runs is . . . not a good idea. I don’t see the race going particularly well, and I think there is a strong chance I could end up DNFing or limping the last 12+ miles and — WHY? There is no good reason. I’m not even optimally trained. I thought I wanted closure on my training cycle but you know what?
I CAN HAVE THAT ANYWAY. I can decide my training cycle is over, race or not. I can take the recovery time even without having run the actual marathon! I can start fresh without possibly damaging my body. So I think that is what I will do.
I’m not going to pretend not to be sad about it. I’m totally sad. Kind of depressed, really. I already cried off all my mascara. I 100% know this is frivolous, not a real problem, etc. But, still sad. I am sure I will feel better once I am running without pain and have a new cycle to look forward too. But DaMn that was the longest ever training cycle without any victorious ending to speak of.
I (ironically) crossed the 2000 mile threshold for 2023 during today’s painful miles. And I don’t even think I need total rest from running! I just need to chill on the long runs and STOP when the pain hits and build a bit more gradually. I think I *do* need PT (preferably someone who works with lots of runners) even if ortho didn’t think so. I also may rent a Peloton for a few months to have a cross-training option (thoughts on Bike vs Bike+, anyone?).
SO. Here we are. I’m not yet happy about it nor do I feel at peace, but I think I’ll be able to get there.