Thank you for all of your wisdom (applied gently and thoughtfully!) related to yesterday’s post, including the reminder that I will probably be sad when life isn’t so full of parenting duties. I don’t know why I’ve felt increased unrest recently, but maybe it’s just the realization that what felt like was “a busy season” isn’t actually a season, it’s just Current Reality with no end in sight. ALSO, G’s fracture may have just . . . . sent me over the edge a little. Thankfully, she is handling cast life well!
I don’t have any overarching conclusions right now but I did feel seen (again, thank you!) and have some things to ponder. Certain ideas are a bit harder to apply in clinical medicine than they would be in a typical knowledge work job. For example, for paid leave time, I don’t generally like to use it for appointments because even days a few months out are already booked with patients, so if I ask for a half day of PL, I’d have to overbook myself and essentially do the same amount of work while blowing through paid leave. A sabbatical sounds amazing but isn’t really practical in the kind of clinical situation I am in (it would be very hard to find someone willing to cover for a few months or a year and then disappear and give me my job back!).
I just looked at my PL spreadsheet and I am definitely already using all of my leave, or slightly more (started the year with balance of +98 hours, and am project to end with +70). I would love to have extra days to take, but it appears I’m already taking what I have. Between the kids’ breaks and gymnastics meets and trips with Josh and taking days for talks/BLP live/etc this isn’t too surprising. And really my call has been backloaded, so I’m going to be busier August through December (4 call weeks!) than I was earlier this year. I do have a bit of a sense of impending doom about all that.
(There will be less travel though? So that will help, some.)
On the short term, I just . . . have to get some significant catchup work done this weekend (not clinical). A decent number of hours. Period. It’s okay. I will survive. Josh is working, and the kids will play video games, and I am confident that all 3 probably be thrilled this with plan. We are limited in terms of what we can do outside anyway (it’s HOT and the obvious activities would be water based, but G cannot get her cast wet, and things like the indoor play spaces are also probably not going to work for similar reasons).
I have a sneaking suspicion that if I can just reach the bottom of my inbox and make some headway on upcoming course-related things I will feel a lot better, even if it doesn’t “fix” the overload situation in any sustainable way.
ENTIRELY UNRELATED:
I just started this:
So far, I like it! But OMG the weird frequency that certain themes are coming up in the MMD picks is getting unnerving (thus far I have read Run for the Hills, The Bright Years, Julie Chan is Dead, Rabbit Moon, and The Road to Tender Hearts). SO MANY half siblings. SO MANY reunited previously estranged family members. SO MANY older people interacting with children. SO MANY children with history of abuse or just horrible parenting, often alcohol related. It doesn’t help that I’m also watching Ginny and Georgia (same themes there too – and I’m not even watching the latest season, so it’s not just 2025 but maybe something I’m attracting or choosing inadvertently!). Just, WEIRD!
8 Comments
If you like the dysfunctional family genre, Bastard out of Carolina is EXCELLENT. Another Ann Patchett rec.
If there is ever a time for your kids to play video games, it’s in Florida during the hot steamy summer when one of them has a broken bone 🙂 Sounds like the perfect plan.
Just came here to say that I really look forward to your daily blogs every single day. I refresh it embarrassingly number of times in a day for its genuineness and how we can do hard things. Really like your positive outlook even on yesterday’s blog. Really inspiring for a working mother like me – I only have one child and still struggle.
Being a working mom is hard no matter what — even if you have “only” one! In my experience, the amount of work doesn’t double (triple, etc.) with each kid because just the baseline amount of effort being a mom takes is A LOT. So hang in there! 🙂
I think blocking out some hours on the weekends to pursue your creative endeavors and get back to personal emails is a great plan! Also getting your nanny to drive the kids to certain appointments that are more routine (orthodontist, dental cleaning etc) if they’re comfortable with that.
I agree with the blocking out some hours on weekends. It’s a mindshift from traditional clinical roles but in the chem path side of my job lots of colleagues end up jumping on and validating results on the weekend allowing them to attend school events/appts etc during the week. Rather than thinking of it eating into the weekend it might be easier to think of it as you have 7 days to the week allowing you flexibility to pick and choose when activities occur.
I love it when my reading choices take on a weird synchronicity! I’ve been experiencing that a lot lately, although with different themes than you’re finding. The themes you’re running into sound pretty heavy and I hope the books are really good and/or you find some lighter (or dark in a different way!) topics in your upcoming reads.
Hi, Sarah! Its understandable that you’re feeling some version of overwhelm given how full your life is, in all areas, and recent medical issues for you and kids.
I don’t have the bandwidth to read all the comments to your last post, but it sounds like folks have suggested some of what I would have. For many years I used Sunday childcare for a couple hours to catch up on grading/ prep for the week in exchange for earlier pickup / stealing weekday time for appts. As the mother of a now 21 year old (!!) I can also see that life can look radically different within a few years time, and careers can have many phases. Imagine the day when you are fully retired from clinical practice….and fully into this creative work.