I guess a certain amount of psychic unrest is natural right now.
I honestly think the answer is to just focus more on what I’m doing. Make the phone call. Talk to the person. Read the book. Take the walk. Etc. It absolutely works, when I can do it.
But also: I have to admit I had been stuck in a loop of travel uncertainty and it was getting to be really distracting. Almost like I was looking for some magic answer that would make me feel okay — or even great! — about our current situation. But after a LOOOOTTTT of searching for various vacation options, I am pretty sure that booking another trip right now is NOT the answer.
In fact, after much reflection I think we’re going to move the one bigger trip we do have coming up! (I know.)
First, I was frantically trying to wedge a Europe trip into (April) spring break so that we would have something to look forward to. But then A decided she might compete another year in gymnastics (she was considering stopping, but is now thinking she’ll do a lot of dance AND gym next year) and the state meet is (of course!) during that April spring break week.
So then, I went to her room and we hatched all of these wild plans taking us to Europe in February, but nothing sat quite right. And then A suggested that maybe we should move our Big Sky trip (currently crammed in awkwardly around New Years’) to February, giving Josh more time to recover. And I thought: that sounds pretty smart, and ALSO we could then book something Caribbean and fabulous for New Years’!
. . . AND THEN I saw what pricing looks like over New Years’ in the Caribbean (think 3-4x normal rates, it is I N S A N E) and gave up on that idea too. I also realized that we live in FL (duh) and I mean . . . we don’t really need to go very far to feel warm in January most of the time. We would probably be just as happy (OR HAPPIER) relaxing here after our tough week of call (both of us).
So now we’re left with:
- Moving Big Sky to Feb (it honestly fits better, plus more recovery time for Josh, and probably better show)
- Really no other big family trips other than that and then Hawaii (OBVIOUSLY) in summer 2027.
And you know what, that’s probably enough trips, especially since I plan to make both of them fabulous. Don’t get me wrong – we have other shorter ventures mixed in too (solo and as a couple, plus I need to get to PHL. Oh and my 25th college reunion in June!). But when it comes to Epic Family Adventures, that sounds like a very healthy amount.
(AND I STILL WANT TO EVENTUALLY DO THE ITALY / SWITZERLAND COMBO OF MY DREAMS. Earmarked for Summer 2028, and now our friends want to meet us in Switzerland so that would be fun!)
What do you do when you have psychic unrest?
A run would be amaaazing but unfortunately not an option.
5 Comments
Oh geez, what I do with psychic unrest is spiral endlessly until something happens to snap me out of it, which is NOT a recommendation, lol. Probably the best thing for me is to just make a decision and then move forward with that. Even an imperfect decision feels better than spinning my wheels.
Your plan to move Big Sky to February sounds very smart, for all the reasons. My family had been talking a bit about trying to do Big Sky in 2027, but for a lot of reasons I don’t think it’s going to work out, and I feel surprisingly okay about it. Will definitely enjoy living vicariously through you though!
I never travel over Xmas break for the reason you mention ($$$$) and being as you’re in Florida I can definitely see the Caribbean not really being in the cards. I agree Big Sky in Feb could be great particularly if Josh is doing better in Feb than in Dec. Seems to me the only downside could be if you just really feel “ready” for a trip since by then it will have been so long since you took a big family trip! So doing it two months earlier could feel nice. But probably not nice enough to outweigh the other advantages of Feb. The good thing is, whenever you do that trip it will feel really nice because it seems like Big Sky is a “happy place” for your family.
I really feel what you’re going through. Last fall my husband ended up in in-patient rehab for 5 weeks after what was supposed to be outpatient surgery. The rehab center was 40 minutes from our house and I tried to visit most days. I really relied on daily and weekly planning and spent a lot of time in my car visiting him and driving my daughter for club soccer. In our situation, we were never home so there wasn’t a lot of time for thinking 🙂 We did end up moving a Disney trip twice. We spent one night in a hotel by rehab just for something different. I think I use planning as a coping mechanism during times like these. I also knew at some point I was going to have a break (and I did, but I knew it was coming so it wasn’t so bad). I am not sure if this is helpful, but know that I see you and it is hard! I think this also when I started keeping the good snacks in my car 🙂
During my most recent period of psychic unrest I rewrote and resubmitted a grant (YMMV). Then I finished a manuscript. Now I am motivating to work on another one. If I didn’t have that I would probably have leaned into writing something else. I have also been doing a TON of walking — like 4-6 miles most days. I have also tackled things around the house that I’ve been putting off, like planting my daughter’s vegetable crop into buckets, organizing the linen closet, fixing the deck (I planned the repairs, husband did the manual labor), spraying the weeds growing in the yard. Could you make yourself a schedule so that you didn’t feel at loose ends so much during the day? Keeping my brain and body busy seem to help a lot.
As far as vacation planning is concerned… well, this summer we had planned to go to Belize, but that did not happen because of my March-present saga of AUB–>hysterectomy–>recovery. I wasn’t *that* upset because I was feeling weird about a summer Caribbean vacation for basically the same reasons you feel weird about a winter one (and it was fully refundable). Instead, we are going up north so my husband can do the Mackinac island swim (13k yeesh) and spending a few days in Harbor Springs for part of the week. We are also doing a weekend in Port Austin with the dogs, and I am doing a mother-daughter trip to Chicago when daughter gets back from camp. I love using ChatGPT to suggest and plan trips just for funsies, but I am wary of booking really far in advance because plans change (for us they change ALL THE TIME). My current travel obsession is Norway in the summer. I am hoping for next summer, but we will see.
Oh! One suggestion — if Josh is still not okay for skiing next February (Open Evidence says *maybe* skiing is ok 9-12 months post injury,,,) you could consider Puerto Rico. Yes, I know you have lovely beaches in FL, but sometimes it is nice to get away. Both times I booked 2-3 months in advance and prices were pretty reasonable. The first time I used San Juan as a base and explored Old San Juan and rented a car and went to Luquillo beach (x2), el Yunque, and did a biobay tour on the southern part of the island. The second time I took daughter and we flew to Vieques and went beach hopping, rode horses, and did another biobay tour. Both trips were fantastic — I would highly recommend.
Another thought is to book a couple nights in a really nice hotel on the beach right here in South Florida in January. It would be expensive, but not as expensive as traveling to the Caribbean. It might be a fun mini-break, and a reward for getting through call weeks.
Anyway- I’ll bet you feel better after rearranging those plans. What you’ve got now sounds realistic, and FUN.