Yes, after 4 months I am going to be taking Annabel to her BFF’s socially distanced birthday party. Masks will be worn. Children will be kept apart to the extent possible. The whole thing will be outside which means that THE WEATHER HAD BETTER COOPERATE.
I have to say, I am starting to miss social interaction but it took a loooong time for that to happen. I do feel like this is a signal that my old life was just too much. Too many events, too many obligations, too much doing and socializing and going from place to place.
Currently, most of our evenings look like this:
5:30 – our nanny leaves (on weekdays)
5:31 – our kids immediately ask me to get dinner ready. Actually, that’s not always true; if they happen to be engaged in reasonable play sometimes they will keep it up until 6ish.
Anywhere between 5:45 and 6:30 – dinner with kids. Josh joins if he makes it home (not super common but it happens at times.)
6:30 – Clean up dinner while kids play and G in particular sneaks away and makes giant destructive messes in other areas (seriously, this is problematic to my sanity. WHEN WILL THIS PHASE END?!). On some occasions (not that common but really we should do it more) one of us drags the kids out for a walk.
7:15 – Kids choose something to watch. I curl up on the couch with my phone or a book or sneak to the next room + play with my bullet journal (yes I’m that cool). They take a break midway through for their nightly treat (most nights: a dark chocolate square and some milk. Yes even G; she is spoiled.)
8:30 – Bring kids upstairs to read books. Brush G’s teeth (the big kids brush their own teeth; not sure when that happened but it is great). Read G 2-3 books and tell her a “Viva Story”. While I put G to bed, Josh is usually putting the big kids to bed. Right now they are reading Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing which I think I read 8334 times myself.
(They LOVE this book.)
9:15 – (hopefully) G asleep. (Sometimes she stays up and sings to herself for a while.)
9:30 – Big kids asleep.
10:00 or a little earlier – I am asleep.
No work social events, kids’ activities, or much else and it feels like plenty.
Today’s Activities:
✅ Workout (about to happen) – Cardio Core, #61
✅ Kids outside
✅ Help A finish wrapping her friend’s gift
✅ 11:30 bday party!
✅ 2:00 home (I hope) + probably take a nap
✅ Open 529s – it’s been on my list for months – TODAY IS GOING TO BE THE DAY. Side note – We currently participate in our state’s “Prepaid” program for all 3 kids but that only covers cost of whatever UF tuition is when they are college aged. We’ve been procrastinating on moving $ to 529s for a while but I think it’s time even if the market does crash. It has 10 years to recover (Annabel) or up to 16 for G!
✅ Write down which outfit pix to take for blog post (take the actual pix tomorrow)
then TAKEOUT NIGHT and some variation of the above evening routine.
15 Comments
We just did our 529s.
That schedule — it seems like you have totally let go of the idea of getting work or anything not kid related done during that time, basically for 4-5 hours every day. I always find that we are trying to add in other stuff (an hour of work for me, Luca might have a meeting with Korea or something, Luca wants to swim), and dinner ALWAYS takes FOREVER (and the cleanup). Between all of that and cooking, I feel like I have to start our “evening” ritual at 4PM and we still never finish until 10. It’s beginning to suck the life out of me.
From a socialization standpoint, I feel like if I talk to one non-family member for 10-15 minutes, I am good on the social interaction for the day. We never really did many social things pre-COVID (see: residency), so the only thing that has changed for us is the pressure to do stuff and the FOMO. Not having to run around to activities all week and weekend has been a big improvement, however.
The only ‘non-kid-focused’ time in my evenings is a) up to an hour (interrupted) while they watch a show (ie what is happening now while i write this comment!) and b) brief period after they go to bed. It just is what it is! When I attempt to ‘do things’ it . . . doesn’t work. (In fact – after reading how not to lose my sh!t with the kids, I have realized it is 100% one of my triggers.)
I haven’t done work at night for years (other than answering calls/entering orders on call). It is basically my life policy not to 🙂
What time does G wake up in the mornings? Also, did you sleep train your kids? I’m right in the thick of it – hitting that 4 month sleep regression and trying to figure out a plan of action, but my favourite is hearing real life stories. I looove the details of bedtimes and routines and so on.
Usually around 7. Sometimes 6:45, sometimes (like yesterday) 7:30. She also takes a 2.5hr nap every day.
I didn’t sleep train really b/c I was very obsessive about nursing (particularly when I was at work and pumping) and I feared that doing much CIO would prevent them to not take what they needed at night. But I wouldn’t necessary recommend my approach. G did not sleep through the night regularly until after she turned 1 (I know that’s probably not what you were excited to hear!). She sleeps fabulously now!
You know, thinking about it . . .this pandemic would have been MUCH better timed for me during one of those torturous pumping periods. lol.
Thanks! No judgment here lol I feel like I’m just making it up as I go along! I think we’ll just suffer if necessary for the next few weeks and then sleep train at five months if it hasn’t improved. (I’ve heard that’s the age when they’re most developmentally ready for CIO although all the sleep experts vary slightly!)
love reading your evening routine.
i miss social interaction too but also realise I truly enjoy hanging out with just my family members 🙂
Curious why you did pre paid and then decided to switch?
No I’m keeping prepaid but that only covers public costs so we always wanted to supplement
Would love to hear more about your FL pre-paid plans….we are in FL with two young kids and debating whether or not to do it!
We signed up years ago when we first moved here. To be completely honest, I just blindly followed a family member’s recommendation to do so! I figured — why not, tuition costs have been skyrocketing and at least this essentially locks in a public tuition. That said, Josh and I are planning on offering to cover the college of their choice which — if they choose private is far more costly. It is my understanding that the Prepaid $ can be used as equivalent $ towards anything if it’s not used for a Florida public U.
I don’t necessarily think we’ll have the entire cost of private college saved up for all 3 kids by their 18th bday (that’s like . . .a LOT and I certainly don’t want to do so at the expense of retirement!) but at least if we’ve saved up half of it, it will make those years less painful. I put in an initial deposit (we had it accumulating in our budget under “529” but just hadn’t been put in yet) and set up a monthly withdrawal, so there will actually be 6 auto withdrawals/month – Fl Prepay and 529 for each kid.
TL/DR: college is freaking expensive.
Can you clean up dinner while your big kids are reading before bed? Maybe that would head off the Destructo Baby time?
Technically yes but practically not really – the last thing I want to be doing at 9 pm is cleaning the kitchen.
But very true that maybe there are creative ways around Destructo time 🙂
I can’t wait for the wardrobe update!
So I am an introvert but have found myself majorly craving friend time during COVID. I think it’s because I never leave the house since I’m working from home. So besides zoom calls/conference calls, I get no social interaction during the day. And I also like breaks on the weekend from the toddler because he is such a mama’s boy so if I am around, he wants me to do everything. We have tried to not give into that but it’s ends up with fits so we just go with it and figure he’ll have to accept help from dad when #2 arrives in December!
Your night schedule reminds me to enjoy the set up we have now, though. Our little guy goes to bed at 7pm and my husband does bedtime every night since I do bath. But he has to be up by 6:30 and is not the best napper so he needs to get around 11 hours of sleep at night! So after bedtime we can watch a show and then I go to bed around 8:30 to read for an hour. I know our schedule will really change when our oldest can stay up later so I will enjoy our quiet, easy nights while I can!