As always, your comments yesterday were gold (and compassionate gold at that). Thank you. I read them all but I am going to read them all again.
I am still reflecting on the subject of remaining present and facing pain (or boredom, or discomfort, or stressful thoughts about the future). Thinking about practical applications of these ideas, the recent Ezra Klein episode hit me pretty hard today.
I listened to the full podcast version, but here’s an article version too.
Yesterday, I made a concerted effort to avoid going to my typical Feelings Escape Hatch (ie: phone; input-seeking; looking for distractions – admittedly, sometimes I do this even when I am being pretty good about avoiding problematic apps).
I really think that so much of my desire to succumb to that “looking for stuff” impulse has to do with avoiding things, from my own thoughts and feelings to boredom and uncertainty and beyond. I knew I had the opportunity for a nice 1:1 night with G (C was at soccer and A was at gymnastics) and wanted to try to lean into being present during those hours rather than just trying to ‘get through’ them.
I felt like this mindset was helpful. We had dinner together, cleaned up, took a walk around the block (she collected random natural artifacts in a wagon), did piano together, and spent 30+ minutes reading 3 chapters of The Indian in the Cupboard, which so far has aged fairly well. (Did anyone else read and re-read this book 50 times in the late 80s/early 90s?). There wasn’t much opportunity for distraction, and the time seemed to speed by.
I have been feeling some dissonance between the way I want screens to be used in our household and the way things have been actually playing out with the kids. In our current “crisis” era, we had fallen into some habits that were not going to be positive over the long run, and I really felt like it was time to stop. And then this episode aired today, and I felt so validated. I mean, obviously is nothing new (I post my own personal manifestos regularly; Cal Newport and Jean Twenge have been shouting it from the rooftops for nearly a decade, and Sarah sent me this delightful link and I just now realized it was from 2017). But when it comes to moving towards presence and finding joy in the every day, it still feels weirdly relevant. I don’t want my kids to instantly grab their own escape hatches in every slightly challenging moment, and I don’t want to do it myself, either.
So, this is April’s singular goal. Yes, I am going to get other things done (I have a list of ‘one offs’ that include travel planning and book tasks). But the primary focus for me is going to be cultivating presence of mind, which means a really critical look at all of the things that take this presence away. I am extending that towards changing the way our family accesses distractions (I’d say digital or otherwise, but they are mostly digital).
I am not going to take away A’s phone or her ability to text friends, as for her this has been beneficial socially (we do not allow social media). I do not want to remove video games or TV from the home — I love it when the kids play Mario Kart together and I think Josh would be pretty sad if he couldn’t watch the Final Four (go Duke . . .). But there are still concrete changes that are worth making (example: I do not think G should ever be spending hours on an iPad, or using one unsupervised, even with parental controls. But sometimes, we were letting that happen). This continues to be (as many things are . . . .) all about intention and mindful consumption vs turning towards a stream of whatever to soothe/balm/escape/distract.
I think one important step here is to be self-compassionate about all of this. Do I think we did the absolute best job cultivating healthy media consumption habits in the kids? Nope!
Do I think it’s entirely our fault, or that we are bad people and/or bad parents who don’t care about our kids at all? Also nope.
Do I see all of this as futile, and “just the way it is now” going forward? A FINAL NOPE. I think we can work on it, and I think it will be worth it, and episodes like the one linked here give me hope because I think that the more these ideas are discussed, the better off all of us will be.
I would love to hear success stories from anyone who has changed their family culture around screen time and is happy with how things have gone.
Finally, I know there may be some who read this and feel like devices/digital distractions have truly NOT been problematic for their kids, or perhaps they feel like on the balance they have been positive. If that is you, please know I am not judging you (and in fact, I might be a little bit jealous – perhaps your kids naturally moderate screen time, and so it’s just not a big deal). That just has not been our experience.
35 Comments
I feel fortunate to be observing this broader debate/ discussion about social media, devices and kids as someone who WILL be facing this in the future, but isn’t really yet. (I have a 2 year old so it’s fairly easy for us to limit screen time as she doesn’t face peer pressure or other external influences that bigger kids have.)
One resource that really makes me think about how we will approach this topic in future, even though I don’t always agree with it, is Katherine Martinko’s The Analog Family substack. She talks a lot about creating a family culture and what you want to emphasize and put time into (vs just cutting out things). I also like that she is coming from an active working and parenting perspective vs someone who is either a stay at home parent, or a person without kids.
Love love love this post and can’t wait to read some comments. I have an 8 and 6 yr old boy – both with ADHD and tendencies to BINGE screens. We do not allow screens of any kind Monday – Thursday and then do allow ps5 and tv watching on weekends. This works for us but I know will need to change and evolve over time. Constant work in progress!!!
Just wanted to share that our 12 yo only has a dumb phone, so he can text/call his friends but no internet capabilities. It is possible for kids to not be addicted to phones. And it has allowed him to avoid much of the middle school drama + viral trend nonsense . Stay strong, parents!
I really love this but I have been told I’m an old person who doesn’t understand that kids use whatsapp and instagram and other apps for communicating. (I mean, I guess that’s social media, but I don’t think people see whatsapp as social media and that’s the most common messaging app here) Is that not the case where you are? My kids are little so I don’t have to think about it yet but the more I hear others talk about this decision the more It seems like it’s not just the “communicating” kids do on phone, it’s the method of communicating that might be important? Only curious how that’s worked for you. Thanks 🙂
He’s pretty involved with sports so sees his friends in person all the time. They text each other but he’s never mentioned needing whatsapp. In our social circle, whatsapp is only used for one of his sports teams, so not common at all. Social media is a hard No from us anyways. When I’m around his friends with access to Instagram, Tiktok, etc, they’re using it for such nonsense that I’m fine to be called an “old person” and restrict it! And no 11/12 yo needs to be checking out OnlyFans, ugh.
We’re not completely oblivious to him wanting to “fit in”…we switched him from the kid Gizmo watch to the Gabb dumb phone when going into middle school…looks less kiddie and allows to text, send pictures, etc. He plays video games at home with friends and talks to them over the games. So I guess to answer your question, it doesn’t restrict his communication with his friends, but he also never just sits around and texts with them for hours. He probably only uses his phone for 1-2h/week. We’ll revisit in 2+ years as he heads into high school.
Apropos of nothing my first bf in college dated Jean Twenge for like three years (before me). I have nothing useful to add except to say that moderating screens does not seem to work for us at all, and the only thing that has worked is prohibiting them until x-o’clock on the weekends. But since I am the only one who seems to be able to remember to take the screens away it often doesn’t happen.
Oh yes and she has had a smartphone since she was 11, with no social media installed. Honestly we have more issues with the video games right now. There has so far been only minimal drama with the phone and 💯 of that was instigated by the one friend who didn’t have a phone. So.
We definitely struggle with this, and the only thing that has worked in our family is basically the same advice that Cal and Laura give adults: crowding out the screen time with other activities or better screen-related activities. We’ve decided that, if the kids are doing well in school and keeping busy with other interests, then we can live with a larger volume of screen time than we’d ideally have. Our two major rules that the kids hate are 1. Internet/YouTube happens on the TV in the living room, not in secret (and is governed by a special router we can use to block content) and 2.No games that connect to the internet. Although my oldest is 12, we haven’t gotten him a phone yet (not because we disagree with it in theory, but because we know he’d just lose it immediately) but we’ll definitely get a “dumb” one. Fortunately none of them have any interest in social media.
First, I would like to say thank you. Thank you for opening up and putting your thoughts out there. It often leads to introspection for me.
We have never had a tv in our 13 years of marriage although that doesn’t mean much in the day of smart phones and iPads. We also have a projector for family viewing. The projector is not always set up (it lives in a box on the bookshelf and we set it up and pull down the screen if we want to watch something together). This small level of inconvenience helps curb some viewing. I also think the fact that there isn’t a big black box staring at us all day also helps.
The other thing that helps is that we only watch tv during certain time blocks. Weekdays kids get 1 show before bed if they’re ready on time (the tv timer starts at a specified time whether they’re ready or not, so if they aren’t ready it limits their viewing time – there is a whole process and culture around this in our house to make expectations clear and put choice and accountability back on them but that’s not explained here). Weekends and summer we never watch tv before lunch. If they ask they know it will be a polite no. Also my kids have no access to their own personal screens (I have a 4 and 7 yo). And I think they just moderate well. We set timers for tv watching on a weekend or rare weekday afternoon viewing (usually 30-60 min) and they know (and expect) it gets turned off when the timer goes off. Sometimes we have to help transition them out of screen time (create momentum around a different activity). Im generally quite happy with the role screens play in our lives.
I really like the content from Techno Sapiens. She’s very balanced in her views and her newsletter feels non-judgmental. She has a new course coming out that is aimed at younger kids, I think ages 2-6. Both of our kids (ages 4 and 7) use iPads but only on the weekend. We do a lot of other things with them on the weekend, but they use their iPads during quiet time. The 4yo only has access to PBS content. Paul mostly plays Mario Bros games or other things like that. We also watch movies together as a family but I feel good about that decision. We could certainly reduce the amount of screen time for them but then the adults would lose their breaks… and selfishly, I really really need those breaks. Theoretically we could ask them to entertain themselves without screens but they are not trained to do activities alone for 1-2 hours at a time… So I make myself feel better about their screen usage since we do a lot of other activities to offset the screen time.
One alternative for you to help w/ the screen time might be to start using the kindle ap on your phone again for reading? When I left social media, I started to really use the kindle ap. It’s a nice alternative when you feel that urge to scroll the news, etc. That said, I know you much prefer physical books so this might not work for you!
I don’t feel great about our practice but our current practice with 3 kids the same age as yours is all about sibling relationships. There is one shared, very locked down phone (no chrome even, just texts, camera and calls) used for when a kid is somewhere without parents, either an extracurricular or at home without parents. Because it’s shared, texts to friends happen but they are monitored by each other and can always be viewed by parents (oldest gets a phone at 14, which will change things). They can each have 1 hour of screen time per day (they use a timer on alexa in kitchen and monitor each other, because, siblings), but they can also join someone else’s hour. This could result in 3 hours a day, but it would only happen if the 3 were playing Minecraft together or watching a movie together, which I want to encourage. And the idea they can be joined at any time, I hope keeps things reasonable. Ideally a parent would always be watching too but I haven’t figured that out yet.
I really like that communal sibling solution!
I also think that this continues to be all about intentional and mindful consumption vs turning towards a stream of whatever to soothe/balm/escape/distract, Dr. Sarah Hart-Unger. What appears to me, however, is that when I use, for instance, my phone’s screen time statistics function to record the amount of time I spent on my phone, it does not show which part of this time is spent on intentional and mindful consumption, and which part of this time is spent on turning towards a stream of whatever to soothe/balm/escape/distract. So you may want to refer to my time-tracking sheets for that info.
I actually don’t have any stories to offer with respect to the 2nd last paragraph.
I do refer to LinkedIn as a social media platform, which makes me wonder if Mr. Erza Klein and Prof. Johnathan Haidt will also refer to LinkedIn as the cause of mental illness. But that is not your problem anymore, Dr. Sarah Hart-Unger.
And no, I have not reread “The Indian in the Cupboard” since I have not even started reading it for the 1st time yet.
Screen time is a big issue for us also. First thing in the morning they are looking for screens to “check the weather”, “check bus times” which rapidly goes to YouTube if not supervised. It is very difficult and tiring to constantly watch the activities on several different screens. Kids will adapt easily to not having screens but unless you actively take the screens away and keep them away, they will not. Kids are developing a fear of being bored. And I suppose adults too.
I’ll share ours. No screens during the week. On weekends we are a bit more laisse faire, but also within limits. The kids set timers, 15 minutes max. When the timer goes off the tv is turned off. I much rather them use tv than iPads. iPads only on planes which is pretty much once a year..
I also hide from kids when I have to use my phone. I don’t know, I don’t like them seeing me on my phone.
When we go places, for example, an activity for one kid but the other kid is tagging along, then we bring books or colored pencils for the kid that’s waiting. Never in a restaurant, never at a supermarket. If it’s a car ride- look out of the window.
This is an issue for us as well! My kids are 10 and the one week we took away screens M-Th it was night and day with attitudes and behaviors. We’d framed that as just a trial to see what happened (and honestly only worked bc my husband was out of town – otherwise he will want to watch some tv in the evening). Afterwards we went to 1 hr of screens but it has been a nightmare to monitor and keep track of for me. So I don’t know! Following in the comments to see what others are doing. I’d like to change something in the summer bc I do feel like if they are home, they are on either their ipad or the tv and are not reading, being creative, etc. I don’t mind the screens but it is the fact that none of these other things happen that I hate.
I don’t really know about this either. So far we’ve been pretty restrictive about screens. No ipads, no video/computer/phone games at all for my 6 or 3 year old (we also have a 1 year old but she’s not interested). They watch TV together in the living room for a couple of hours on the weekends usually now, but until the 1 year old was born that was usually only 1 day per weekend and not both. During the week the TV is usually not on. But the thing is, when you don’t let kids this age use screens YOU DON’T GET ANYTHING DONE! Your house is a mess and it’s hard to cook something healthy or do anything for yourself. As I’ve been able to see my oldest able to moderate herself and entertain herself more on her own I’ve felt more at ease with letting the TV be on more, but who knows how this will impact the 1 year old down the line (and I wonder if this was a similar situation w you SHU where you started out w minimal screens for A but it changed over time for G). But I’m also so tired and overwhelmed with clutter by this point that I wish the baby would just watch some d*** Bluey already lol.
My younger 3 kids (3, 6, 11) have been screen free for almost a year now. It’s amazing how much they read, play with each other, play games, make art, and play with their friends since we eliminated screentime. The first few weeks were hard both for me not using it as a babysitter and for them having to entertain themselves more. We have no plans to add screentime back into our lives. One of the best parts is they never ask for it anymore. The can I have screentime fights/debates were the worst!
My oldest (13) has learned to regulate his screentime. He read the book The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt and took it to heart. He uses the family ipad for research, tuning his cello and orchestra homework. I know he sneaks it occasionally when I’m not home, but those times are few and far between lately. Overall, he’s in a much better place with screens than when he was younger.
Still no phone, he’s always been able to call from school or use a friend’s phone if he needs to get ahold of me. We’ll probably get him a dumb phone when he starts driving.
My daughter has three children ages 9 1/2, 8 and 6. She has never allowed them to use a phone or tablet. She told me that as a child’s brain develops – using screens is not good for the development. She was more technical but that’s what I took from it. Good luck. When my children were growing up it wasn’t an issue and for that I’m so grateful.
We have a five year old and she gets about 45 minutes of tv time split into a 15 min morning block and 30 minute pm block before dinner on weekdays. She occasionally gets whiny about turning it off in the PM block but I think that is more being hungry for dinner. On weekends she usually gets a longer AM block if we don’t have plans.
She doesn’t have an iPad or tablet and I just found out at her kindergarten orientation that she’ll be given one at school to use during a block of time there and I’m pretty bummed!
Loved reading through everyone’s comments. I feel like we’re not doing the best at managing screen time. My boys are 8 and 10. They are busy with sports and other activities, so there is limited time when they can use their screens…but when they do, they will watch things as long as possible. My friend does “screen free” days for her kids (established days of the week that are screen free) and that seems to work well.
YouTube is the worst. We let them watch an hour of YouTube on the weekends, but I’m honestly thinking of blocking it entirely. At least a tv show or movie has a plot! And video games use some problem solving skills.
Agree about YouTube. Not every creator is terrible but the overall pace and vibe is not good.
Our kids are a little bit older, but we never moderated screen time. For them, it was a portal to learning. They were always reading and learning about things; or doing homework, learning design and engineering softwares, making documentaries for National History Day competitions, etc. Knowing how to use technology is a skill. Gaming and social media was never a thing for us or our kids. Is reading a physical book good, but reading on a Kindle bad because a Kindle is a device? Is watching TV bad if it’s a documentary just because the TV is a device?
Not at all. (And wasn’t trying to imply that). However, if you’ve seen many teens today that is not what is happening- it’s much more of an issue with social media, short video, and addictive games.
It is so interesting reading how everyone does screen time! I definitely think there are ebbs and flows around using it, at least in our house. Our current rules are, with our 5 and 6 year olds, is they can watch PBS kids in the morning while we get ready for work. They do not get to watch it at any other point on weekdays. On the weekends, they can watch Disney or Netflix kids in the morning for a couple of hours. We don’t do any other screens or media at this point. I don’t always feel great about the kids watching TV on weekdays, but my husband and I are both teachers,so we have to be ready to leave EARLY and tv helps us achieve that. Also, this sounds terrible, but I don’t like interacting with my kids first thing in the morning. I think part of it is because I know I’m about to spend 8 hours interacting with kids non stop, and… that’s a lot of kid interaction lol. For us, a quiet morning is more important than downtime later in the day.
Oh, I want to listen to that episode! I’m intrigued that Florida is one of the states talking about cell phones in schools.
I like your April goal. And I like how you mentioned “leaning into” the time with G as opposed to just trying to get through it. One of my favorite sayings is “If you can’t get out of it, get into it.”
I wish I had words of wisdom about the screen time. I was great about it when my kids were little, but once they got their phones, I probably did everything wrong. My son (22) struggles with his own screen addiction- but at least he’s aware of the issue. With my daughter (16) I think it’s a matter of talking to her, an almost-adult, about how she’s going to moderate herself moving forward. So- I know it’s hard, but you’re doing the right thing by fighting against it while your kids are still young.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this, Sarah! I especially love your remarks about leaning into time with your daughter. I only have one child who isn’t even 1 yet, so her screen time isn’t as much of an issue. However, I’ve become a lot more aware of my own screen usage around her as she’s becoming more interactive. I don’t want her to feel like she’s fighting with a screen for mom’s attention. I think it would be helpful for me to work on the “leaning in” mindset shift when playing with her.
I feel like screen “rules” / family culture varies hugely based on the ages of the kids. If your kids are 6 and 8, or 2, 4 and 6, your rules and family culture will be totally different from a family with kids who are 11, 13 and 17. Sarah, you and I share some similarities in that we have tweens / teens and younger kids in the same household, which I find makes things tricky.
My kids are (almost) 13, 10 and 4. We have some screen rules but are not rigid. Our practices include no smartphones or social media, no YouTube, and limited gaming. My older kids have largely stopped watching much TV apart from documentaries (my oldest loves sport documentaries). My youngest loves cartoons, so we let him watch a show or 2 at the end of the day when he gets home from preschool. Otherwise, my older kids play games on our Nintendo switch or this weird random game my son plays on (my) iPad, which he can play with his friends.
We’re not a screen free family, we’re not even particularly low tech, but we do try to not make screens the center of our lives. We also don’t make them this taboo thing. It’s important that I teach my kids good digital habits and normalize what it looks like to have a healthy relationship to technology. I’ve noticed my 13yo tends to view screens / phones as this “cool” thing, like a passage into adolescence or adulthood. I also know this stance could be a reaction or response to my own knee jerk negativity toward technology in general, so I take it all with a grain of salt and try very hard to be as chill as possible about tech while still upholding my boundaries.
All that to say, I don’t think anyone really knows what they’re doing here. Most of us are just trying to do our best. Our kids will have to reckon with the digital world at some point, and I want to strengthen their ability to do that.
This is one of the harder parenting things I’ve struggled with. My kids are 8 and almost 11 and do not have their own devices. We have a family iPad and laptop and we have TV/Video games in communal areas. I feel like we don’t have a great “balance” for a variety of reasons. 1)I feel it is SO HARD to manage time limits: does it count if I’m texting Grandma or designing something for the 3D printer? I’m in the middle of a Rocket League game/tournament and quitting will ruin my status. If we set times (like between afterschool and 4:30) then they will not do other things like play with a friend so they don’t miss their window. And if we go somewhere (DOING SOMETHING FUN) and they miss their time they complain. It is exhausting. I would lean towards something like no screens on weekdays but that doesn’t work because 2)My husband grew up in a family that always had the TV on and did everything in front of the TV. He had TV and video games in his room from a young age. So he sees no problem with endless video games for our kids. I don’t think TV and video games are “bad” (we don’t have social media yet or allow endless things like YouTube shorts), but I worry more about what they are NOT doing. They can be really creative or get really into a project or a book, but if the TV is on or screen time is available, they are ALWAYS going to choose that. They cannot self regulate and especially for my youngest, will almost always choose a screen over anything else. So I spend my time constantly regulating it and it’s exhausting. We did start “screen free Wednesdays” but even that I have to constantly manage (can I see if Jeremy can play? Does 3D printer count? Can I check the weather?) and I’m the only one that enforces it. No helpful tips, but solidarity! This is hard!
I saw the Ezra Klein pop up yesterday and when I went to listen today, I saw it has a new episode title: “Our Kids Are the Least Flourishing Generation We Know Of”. It has the same guest and date so I assume the same, but so interesting! Never seen that before!
It’s nice to see what others do for screen time and it gives me an idea for how to strike the balance as the kids get older. We have two young boys (6 and 4). Before, they got access to more screen time (usually disney/ youtube on TV – 1 hr on weekends) when they were younger and we needed them to stay out of trouble for longer than 10 minutes. Now, they can easily play together/read on their own. In terms of screen time, they can choose a movie for Friday nights. Either they both watch the same movie or different ones on different TVs. We encourage them to choose together but sometimes that doesn’t happen. On the weekend, they have one hour of gaming with their dad as they do a puzzle/adventure game (Myst/Riven). They mostly talk out loud what’s happening, how to solve the puzzle etc. When sick/miserable, we let them watch a little cooking video on youtube or something of interest. We primarily use screen/video during the week if we want to share concepts from school (like what does a sandcat look like.). We avoid the screens because we can tell our kids get so hypnotized. The 6 yr old is an avid reader and one evening, when the younger one went to bed early, me, my husband and the 6 yr old read our own books on the couch before bed, which was so heartwarming.
We give alternatives to screen so easy access to books, legos and art supplies (or just flyers to cut up). I recently put out painting supplies on a table and just refreshed the paint/water/paper as they use them up. Honestly, they don’t notice the screen time because they don’t know any better. We do have a tablet but we primarily use it for learning to play the piano. Going to the grandparents is another ballgame though because the tv is always on or they are indulged by my brother and they watch train videos on youtube.
I am in a very similar state with my kids. They are currently 9, 7 and three and I am embarrassed how I let things lapse over the past couple of months. I was dealing with a back injury so I don’t regret the quiet time it provided me (I needed it!) but now the boys have become accustomed to having time on phones to play video games every day. That is not a habit that my husband and I want to continue so now we have to try to undo what we’ve done. my three-year-old has adopted quite an attitude and yes she’s three but also her time watching tv has been ridiculous and we need to scale it back. I think I am hoping for some kind of a solution that doesn’t involve them reacting with bad behavior/yelling/etc but that might just be unavoidable. Would love to hear how others have changed direction.
Try not to feel bad about past decisions. We all have seasons where our kids have had more screen time than we would like. We cut screen time when our youngest three kids were 2, 5, & 10. The ‘withdrawal’ period was 2-3 weeks where they got upset and threw tantrums for screen time. This is a normal response. It meant my kids have typical developing brains. I just reminded myself that it would get better and that’s how we got through! Keeping them busy with other things like play dates and enticing art supplies helped too. Going through those few weeks of occasional drama was worth it! My kids new default activities are: spending time outside with friends, reading, playing games, caring for our animals, and creating in the art room. I feel like we are finally living out the values I’ve wanted to cultivate for years!
I think this is so family-dependent but also kid-dependent. I have two – almost 14 and almost 9. The younger one had SO MUCH MORE access to screens at a young age than our eldest did because of the pandemic. Yet she can regulate no problem, will watch screens if available, but also happily chooses to do something else instead if she’s more interested. Our big kid cannot self-regulate, would watch screens 24/7 if allowed, but also feels a huge part of his identity is tied to gaming.
Our school board gives the kids a Chromebook starting in grade 5 (with access to YouTube!!!) and that has been a disaster for our eldest. So I feel very much like I’m fighting an uphill battle at home.
The big kid has had a dumb phone since grade six and will get a smartphone when he goes into high school. Not having a smartphone has hurt his relationships with his friends – he gets left out of things all the time because he’s not on the group chats. I expect this will be an even bigger problem with our youngest.
We have set rules – no screens in the morning, not at the table, not when driving or waiting somewhere or in restaurants, not after dinner (unless we’re watching a show as a family) – and then time limits for after school and on the weekends. I don’t feel like they spend their lives on screens, but if I don’t enforce the limits, they won’t get off. Some days it feels like a constant battle.
But also, I was a latch-key 80s kid and my siblings and I wasted HOURS after school every day watching terrible television and we turned out ok. The addictive nature of the stuff on screens now and the portability and ease of access are new issues, but I don’t stress if my kids aren’t spending all their screen time watching/playing something educational or that I think has value.
These comments are gold; I’ll be coming back to them. My kids are 5 and 2, and I’ve been exceedingly strict with screen time. My 5 year old earns movie night (about an hour) with stickers for behavior. We have a little bit of grandparent screen time and the very occasional football game on. I’d guess they’re at about 1 hour a week or so total.
Like others have commented, while I like this in principle, we get 0 done. There’s no downtime without TV time at this age, though the big is getting better.
I also worry about being too backward about it. I decided against our public school in part because they were issued laptops in kindergarten and no teacher could tell me exactly how long they were on screens…Maybe a few hours a day. So we’re going to a low tech private school. But my husband had correctly pointed out that she can’t live in a bubble forever, so when do we teach her?
Ughhhhh